It’s Dark, it’s American, and hell it’s Hawt
May 22, 2016 12:58:33 GMT -5
'The Shine' Brent Alpine likes this
Post by Mikey eXtreme on May 22, 2016 12:58:33 GMT -5
It’s Dark, it’s American, and hell it’s Hawt
We join our hero at a burger joint in Reading, Pennsylvania. Mikey’s eating a barbeque burger: half pound of angus beef, bacon, caramelized onions, more bacon, cheese, barbeque sauce, more bacon. To wash it down, Mikey has a vanilla milkshake.
The year? 1950. Actually, it’s 2016. Well, at least, Mikey hopes it is because he’s been putting 2016 on all official documents that he signs. But, that’s a story for another time.
Mikey is devouring this burger when some moronic waitress comes up to bother him.
Waitress: Everything okay, sir?
This annoys Mikey.
Mikey eXtreme: Did I call you over here?
Waitress: Well, no, but I--
Mikey eXtreme: Just wanted to come bother the greatest competitor the WCF has ever seen?
Waitress: The what?
Mikey boiled over with anger.
Mikey eXtreme: The WCF! Wrestling Championship Federation!
The waitress looked surprised.
Waitress: Didn’t that place close? I thought it went out of business.
Mikey rolled his eyes.
Mikey eXtreme: No. In fact, there is a WCF Classic going on and I have been selected to compete in the tournament. Which, is only natural seeing as how there is nobody better than me.
Waitress: Who do you gotta go up against?
Mikey sighs.
Mikey eXtreme: I draw Zombie McMorris in round one.
Waitress: Oh?
Mikey eXtreme: One half of the greatest tag team in the last decade of wrestling. Dat Hawt American Darkness.
Waitress: Were you guy the champions or something?
Mikey eXtreme: No, but we had the potential! We could have gone all the way. Hell, we could have become the longest reigning tag team champions of all time.
Waitress: But?
Mikey eXtreme: But.. we didn’t. Things just didn’t happen. The world did not get to witness that beauty. Maybe, maybe it was best. Maybe the world wasn’t ready for something of that magnitude.
In a way, it’s like we saved the world.
Waitress: You saved the world.. Because you didn’t become tag team champions..?
Mikey eXtreme: If we had gone on to rise to the top and claimed those titles, the feat would have been so amazing that the world would have began to implode. Not being able to ever top what we had done, the world would lose all motivation.
What's the point if you can’t beat something that great?
So, yes. I saved the world.
Waitress: I wouldn’t say you saved the world, but, it’s a touching story.
Mikey eXtreme: Don’t you have any other tables?
Waitress: No.
Mikey rolls his eyes again as the scene fades.
Untitled
Mikey eXtreme: Its an opportunity that I cannot pass up. Its far too important. It’ll catapult me back to the top. Back where I belong.
Not that these moronic fans will appreciate it. Not that they’ll look at it the way I will. They’ll think I’m turning my back on them. Like I even care about them?
The only thing that matter to me is winning. The only thing that matters to me is championship gold.
I am under-appreciated and it’s time for a change.
Freakshow: I’m down with your decision.
Vidalia Me too. Whatever happens, I’m by your side.
Mikey eXtreme: Good. Because there are changes coming. This is our time and we will shine. We will be the most talked about in the WCF once again. Title or no title, this will shake the ground of the WCF. This will shape the future and I will be right there.
Dealin’
Mikey was climbing his way to the top. After an impressive United States title reign, it was obvious the direction that Mikey eXtreme would be moving.
So clear, in fact, that half the company ran away in fear of having to face the greatest WCF superstar of all time.
Did this bother Mikey? Who was on pace to become the new Hardcore champion at XIII? He didn’t need that title to cement his legacy as one of the greatest hardcore wrestlers in history.
He didn’t need to beat the former World Champion, it didn’t matter that the current United States champion had left before Mikey could use his rematch clause.
It didn’t even matter that the United States championship was gone.
Mikey was still around. The WCF was his home and it always would be. It didn’t matter how many ran away in fear. It didn’t matter how many tucked their tails between their legs at the thought of stepping in that ring and becoming Mikey’s next victim.
But where to go from here? Mikey had to deal with this dilemma and he had to do it quickly. He couldn’t get lost in the shuffle. Everyone was going to try to seize these new opportunities. Everyone wanted to be at the top.
Did Mikey need the recognition? As long as he was claiming victims he didn’t really care much. The souls that filled the chamber was recognition enough. Recognition that he was the most violent and blood thirsty psycopath in the WCF.
The WCF Classic was Mikey’s to win or lose. HE could take this opportunity and ride it into the upper echelon of the WCF. He could come off this tournament holding the WCF world championship. He could be the face of the WCF.
This all hinged on beating one half of the greatest tag teams to ever set foot in the WCF. He had to beat Zombie McMorris. One half of Dat Hawt American Darkness, a team destined for greatness, an unbeatable force that would be too much for the WCF to handle.
Would Mikey be okay going up against Z-Mac? Mikey didn’t see the harm, he could bring a war to Zombie, it wouldn’t change the fact that together they are unbeatable, unbreakable, and unhinged.
Zombies
Mikey sat alone on a bench in the park, it was lightly raining, but Mikey sat there unfazed. He was in deep conversation with himself, while rocking back and forth.
Mikey eXtreme: I gotta face Zombie McMorris
Mikey eXtreme: So? It’s not the first time you’ve been on the other side of the ring against him.
Mikey eXtreme: This will be the third time.
Mikey eXtreme: See! You’ve got this.
Mikey eXtreme: We’re 1-and-1 but they were both in meaningless clusterfuck tag matches.
Mikey eXtreme: That’s fine.
Mikey eXtreme: But, he’s never seen me like this. He’s never seen me with this fire.
Mikey eXtreme: Nobody has.
Mikey grinned.
Mikey eXtreme: I’ll do anything to win this match. I’ll do anything to win this tournament.
If I have to tear Zombie apart, then.. So be it. He’d understand. I’m sure he’s going to try the same thing. But, he will be able to beat me. He will not have his arm raised in victory over the greatest competitor in WCF history.
He’s got accolades. He’s the greatest Internet champion.. The greatest hardcore champion.. He’s held the television title, the tag titles, the US title.. He’s done a lot. He’s achieved a lot. But he’s not as hungry as I am. He’s not looking to the future the way I am.
Z-Mac is content where he is. He’s got that title around his waist. He’s got everything going for him right now. He doesn’t need this tournament. Hell, this tournament does nothing for him.
Mikey eXtreme: It doesn’t. It makes no sense for him to even be in this tournament.
Mikey eXtreme: This is my tournament. I am the embodiment of the WCF. It’s my time to shine. Ol’ Z-Mac has had his time to shine. It’s my turn! It’s the age of eXtreme. The dawn of a new era is upon us and it starts with dethroning the old guard. The champions of the past will all crumble before me.
The best the WCF has to offer, they will all fall before me. They will be forced to worship their king. It starts at Slam with Zombie McMorris and it ends with me holding that WCF world championship. It ends with me on top of the mountain.
Z-Mac, I’m coming for you. We’ll put on a hell of a show, hell, we’ll steal the show. People will talk about this match for years to come.
“The beginning of an era!”
The Era of eXtreme. The era of Mikey.
I rise now, and I don’t fall any time soon. I rise to the top and I stay there. I thrive there. This whole federation bows before me, they worship me. They want to be me.
They can’t become me.
I am one and only. There are no others like me. There is nobody that comes close to me, and that’s why I will win this tournament. That is why I will destroy ol’ Z, that’s why I’ll move on to destroy whoever I get matched up with in the second round. This tournament will go in my favor.
Zombie McMorris will rise from the dead, I’ll make sure not to deliver any fatal headshots. But, he will feel the wrath of eXtreme. He will find out why I am as good as I say I am.
I took out Chelsea Armstrong. I ended Bernard Core. I ended Vengeance.
I’m not all talk.
I’m not all show.
I am The King of eXtreme.
A large grin took over Mikey’s face.
Mikey eXtreme: Yes you are, Mikey. An unbeatable monster.
Mikey eXtreme: The future World Champion. I like the sound of that. It rolls off the tongue so eloquently.
Hank Brown Chronicles: Episode 1
Mikey was sleeping in his hotel when someone began loudly knocking on his door. He rolled over with a yawn to look at the clock. He wiped the cold out of his eye. It was 5:46 in the morning.
hank brown: Mikey! Are you awake?
Mikey couldn’t believe that Hank Brown had the audacity to wake him up this early for some shitty interview.
Mikey eXtreme: What?
hank brown: Is it too early to get a word with you?
The door flung open and before Hank could muster out a syllable, he was met with a vicious super kick that sent him crashing to the floor.
12:35 PM
Mikey’s eyes slowly opened. Sitting in a chair a few feet from him was Hank Brown. Mikey thought he was dreaming. Why was this moron in his room? Hell, how did he get in?
Vidalia: Mikey, get up.
Vidalia nudged Mikey.
Vidalia: This creepy dude won’t leave until you give him an interview.
Mikey pulled himself up, sitting on the edge of the bed.
Mikey eXtreme: You got breakfast ready?
Vidalia brought him a jack and coke and a McGriddle.
Mikey eXtreme: You know me so well.
They laughed.
hank brown: You sure you should eating that before the start of the WCF Classic?
Mikey eXtreme: It don’t matter, Hank. What’s the worst that could happen?
hank brown: Uh, you could lose?
Mikey eXtreme: What did you just say to me?
hank brown: I’m just saying, if you don’t take this match with Z-Mac serious, then.. You could lose.
Mikey rolled his eyes.
Mikey eXtreme: I don’t lose.
hank brown: But, you recently lost the WCF United States Championship.
Mikey eXtreme: That was a fluke. I did not lose that belt. Steve Orbit lost that belt, I was not beat. I was not pinned. I did not submit. I did not lose. I should still be champion.
But I’m not.
And that motivates me.
That motivates me to rise even higher. To claim more accomplishments.
hank brown: This is a tough tournament.
Mikey eXtreme: Tough? There’s nothing tough about this. It’ simple. Step in the ring. Do what you do best. Get your arm raised.
And this week I got Z-Mac. The same Z-Mac that lost his hardcore title to Katherine Phoenix. Come on, I got this. As much as I respect Z-Mac, a loss like that really hurts his credibility. He ate a pin fron Freezer Burn lately too.
His stock is dropping.
This is why I have to win this round. This is why I WILL win this round.
Mikey eXtreme is the future of this business. I’ve paid my dues, I’ve put in a lot of work in my career, and now the ultimate opportunity is at my feet. I can cash this in, I can already feel it.. I can taste the World Championship.
Steaks every night.
This is what I deserve and nobody is going to take it away from me.
Not Z-Mac. Not Thomas Uriel Bates. Not Gemini Battle. Not Logan. Not Oblivion. Not Game. Not Dag Riddik. Not Twilight. Nobody in this tournament can stop me.
Destiny.
hank brown: So you’re not afraid of any matchup in this tournament?
Mikey eXtreme: Not a single one, Hank. I think I match up favorably to everyone. I got the speed. I got the moves. I got the power. But most importantly, Hank, I have more drive than anyone in the WCF.
hank brown: Some might say you’re insane.
Mikey eXtreme: Insane?! That’s just a matter of opinion. Which is totally uncalled for.
hank brown: There were reports of you talking to yourself on a park bench in the rain the other day.
Mikey eXtreme: That’s ridiculous! The other day, Doc and I went to the park to clear our heads. Perhaps the morons making up these stories were just getting a bad angle.
hank brown: Well, that’s possible..
Mikey eXtreme: Are you calling me a liar, Hank?
hank brown: No! Not at all!
Mikey glares at him.
hank brown: Will you take it easy on Z-Mac?
Mikey eXtreme: No. Not at all. What’s the point? It’ll just mess me up for the rest of the tourney. I can’t go easy on anyone and show any kind of weakness. I need to be vile and ruthless. I need to make a statement.
That’s all this match is, Hank. A statement.
The scene fades.
Blood
Mikey sits in the darkness, his profile barely visible.
Mikey eXtreme: Zombie..
I give this warning to all of my opponents, and it’s not going to stop now.
Zombie.. You have one option. Run away. Don’t show up for this match. You have other things on your table, you have other things to take care of this week. Just ignore this match, don’t show up.
I won’t hold it against you.
The WCF Galaxy won’t hold it against you.
It’s the smart thing to do, Z, it’s the best thing to do. Think about the future, Zombie. Think about the children.
Well, don’t think about those ungrateful assholes.
Think about yourself.
You don’t know which Mikey is going to show up to Slam. Is it going to be the fun loving United States loving Patriotic Mikey? Or the sadistic pain loving murderous bastard that paints the canvas with blood?
I suggest you prepare for that second one, Z. Because I am expecting to tear through the WCF. I’m expecting to shed so much blood over the next few weeks.
This tournament will not be forgotten. Especially with everything I have planned. Especially with all the damage I will bring. Especially with the violence that will be brought to this ring.
Prepare yourself, Z. You’re the first victim of this tournament. You’re the first sacrifice of this new era of the WCF.
Slam is mine. The WCF title will be mine.
Your soul.. Will be.. mine.
Mikey begins laughing uncontrollably and leans closer to the camera. He his covered in blood from head to toe.
Mikey eXtreme: Get used to this image, WCF.
It is your future.
The scene fades.