The death of Sports radio...or You call that Sauce?
Mar 6, 2016 16:30:49 GMT -5
Joey Flash, Lilith, and 1 more like this
Post by Cormack MacNeill on Mar 6, 2016 16:30:49 GMT -5
(Portions of the following rp were created in association with the one and only Steve Orbit. Opinions expressed are those of Cormack MacNeill and should not be taken as the opinions of the WCF or any of it's imitators.)
KCSF 'The Sports Animal' Radio Station
Colorado Springs Colorado.
'And welcome back to Drive-Time Sports, driven by Suss Superstore. We're your hosts for the next few hours, and I'm Matt Pauley.
'And I'm Ryan Kaufman. Today we have a special guest on Drive-Time. WCF Superstar Cormack MacNeill is in the studio. Say hi to the listeners, wouldya?
Hey, and thanks for having me on today laddies. I love doing stuff like this. If I play my cards right, maybe I can even catch a hockey game before heading home.
Denver is only an hour up the road. Although they aren't looking like they'll have a good year. They're in the middle of a ...
Rebuild. Yeah I know. You gotta give them time to develop. They've got good young talent and a good coach. They'll be fine. Anyway, I was thinking about catching a Tigers game. Lot of NHL players came out of that college.
That's true. Enough about hockey, let's talk about the upcoming show this Sunday. You're facing off against Dag Riddik and Logan, with Steve Orbit on your side. What can the fans expect to see?
First off, the fans are going to see an awesome show. We've got the best wrestling talent in the world working for us, and every show is always full of great action and more than a few surprises.
Ok, what about your match? What can you tell the folks at home who might have not been watching lately. I understand you're the number one contender to Dag Riddik's International Championship, right?
Right Ryan. We'll face off for the title at Explosion. This Sunday will be a good chance for folks to get a preview of that match. And some great wrestling.
Right. This match has the International Champion, a WCF Hall-of-Famer in Logan, and a sure fire first ballot Hall-of-Famer in Steve Orbit. What can you tell us about your gameplan?
Well, I'm not going to give it away Matt, but I will tell you this much. It's an honour stepping in the ring with a man like Steve Orbit. Two-time World Champion, among many other belts he's held over the years, outs him in a class of his own. It's always nice to have a partner that you know you won't have to worry about. If anything, it's me that's got some proving to do. And Steve and I will be on the same page, count on that. He wants to get his hands on Logan as badly as I want to get my hands on the Champ.
Logan...what do you make of him. Legendary wrestler, another multi champion. What are your chances againt him.
No argument from me, Logan is a Hall-of-Famer. Legendary career, some of the best matches ever put on in a WCF ring. There's no arguing his talent. It's his drive that comes into question. His work ethic. It's as if Logan is just biding his time, waiting for a retirement that honestly should have come years ago. He built a legacy that will stand the test of time, and he's pissing all over it. Making a fool out of himself running around with the Family, using rookies to make himself look fresh and relevant. It's almost like he doesn't know who he is if he's not in the WCF. He's everything Orbit isn't. Orbit is active, relevant, always dangerous. Logan is a shell of his former self. A joke. A clown that plays for his own amusement, too self-centered to understand that as long as he plays at being a wrestler, there's some kid somewhere looking to break in that just won't have the opportunity. So, am I worried about Logan. Not with the real Hall-of-Famer on my side. not anymore. He's not the Logan of old. He's just going through the motions.
I might not have a mastery of moves, won't find me flying around the ring, but I'm steady. Dedicated. Working to make myself and those around me a little better every day. Picking up my lunch pail and going to work, while guys like Logan and Dag Riddk play at being wrestlers.
Wow, ok. What about the Champion, Dag Riddik. I'm getting the feeling there's no love lost between you two.
No, there's isn't. He took the belt from a worthy champion in Punkin/Caliban, and shit all over it. Men like Kira Sakazaki and Trent Hunter wore this strap. Even a younger, more relevant Logan wore it. Now Dag spends his days on the internet, talking trash on social media instead of getting out there and making that damn title mean something again. mark my words boys, when I win that strap from him at Explosion, I'm going to make it relevant again. Make it mean something. Defend it every night if need be. And I will spend my time being a true International Champion.
Not like Riddik who's hiding behind his 'Family' and making threats online. He's a sham, a fake, a pseudo-Norwegian knothead. I've stood in the ring with some talent, and fought against some as well. I know talent when I see it. Logan, he has talent. No clue what to do with it anymore, but his pedigree speaks for itself. Steve Orbit, he's got talent oozing out from every pore.
Dag's the odd man out here. He's got no place in this match, and he's got no chance of holding onto that belt. In a way, I'm actually happy he's hiding out and not putting the belt up. I'm the number one contender, and I'll take on whoever is wearing that International Title at Explosion. No problem. But there's something about Dag Riddik that makes you want to kick his head off his shoulders. And kick his ass all around Colorado Springs. And before the night is over, I'll do my best to make both of those things come true.
Well, that was enlightening. You heard it here folks. Get your tickets for Slam this Sunday while they last. Thanks again for spending time with us Cormack, and good luck in your match this Sunday.
Thanks guys, and wish Dag Riddik luck, he;s going to need it more than I will.
Some time later...
A black pickup truck rolled slowly along Colorado Springs' main road. Squat brown buildings lined up on either side of the street like cadets at inspection. The large figure behind the wheel looked from side to side as he moved down the road smoothly. Clearly he's looking for something. After a few more minutes of this, he pulls over to the curb and fishes out a phone from the center divider. His bearded visage furrows as he tries to type on the small phone with his broad hands.
(Sausage fingers and smartphones don't mix folks. Take it from me)
He looks up from the phone in frustration and stares straight ahead at the building a few units down from where he parked. A small man stumbles out of the front door, gagging and spitting. He throws up very violently and seems to toss a small bottle towards the street. The bottle rolls to a stop a few feet from the truck, so Cormack steps out slowly and gives it a kick. The bottle rolls over to reveal the label, which reads simply
Mack Sauce
With a shake of his bald head, Cormack climbs back into the truck and puts it in gear, rolling smoothly down the street and turning into the lot past the still spewing figure. He moves to the back of the building, and backs into what appears to be an alley. Having given up on typing, he flicks a button on the dash and settles the phone into a cradle near his knee. A loud bing sounds from the trucks stereo system, and MacNeill reaches down to make several clumsy swipes at the phone's display. After a few awkward attempts, a ringtone can be heard in the cab.
Yeah, this is Orbit.
Orbit, it's Cormack.
Cormack, what's up.
Just got here. Parked out back in the alley.
Aight, just wait. I'm finished, I'm comin' out now
Behind the studio building, a 2015 pickup truck rolls into a parking spot. Orbit exits the building and lights a Black & Mild. A large, intimidating, mountain of a man exits the pickup truck and begins to head towards Orbit. As he gets closer, we realize that this man is none other than Orbit's tag team partner for the week-- Cormack MacNeill. Orbit extends his hand as Cormack draws near, and the two men shake hands.
Steve Orbit: Cormack MacNeill. You bigger than I expected.
Cormack grins.
Steve Orbit: Look man, I appreciate you takin' the time to meet me here. I know it ain't the ideal situation, I'm just real busy this week.
Cormack MacNeill: No problem Steve, had to get out of the hotel anyway. But what's up with the secret meeting? Why here?
Orbit pulls out a bottle of Mack Sauce.
Steve Orbit: Cuttin' hot sauce promos.
Cormack laughs. He takes the bottle and examines it.
Cormack MacNeill: Mack Sauce... any good?
Orbit laughs.
Steve Orbit: Hell no! Shit tastes like rat poison and dog piss mixed with gunpowder.
Cormack takes off the cap and sniffs it. His face screws up and he lets out a hearty cough, handing it back to Orbit.
Steve Orbit: See what I mean?
Cormack MacNeill: Smells like Z-Mac's jockstrap. And don't ask me how I know what the smells like.
Steve Orbit: Anyway, people tellin' me I need to expand my brand. I'm tryin' to get as many checks comin' in from as many sources as possible-- I ain't tryin' to be that guy who has to wrestle when he's fifty, nah mean?
Cormack MacNeill: Aye.
Orbit takes a pull off the Black & Mild.
Steve Orbit: Besides, I keep turnin' in performances like last week, I might have to hang this shit up sooner than I thought.
Cormack shakes his head in disagreement
Cormack MacNeill: You looked great to me. Good as ever.
Steve Orbit: Yeah, thanks-- except I lost to freaking LOGAN. AGAIN. This mother fucker ain't won a match in five years and all of a sudden he's beating me at every turn.
Cormack nods, and there's a brief moment of silence.
Cormack MacNeill: I think you're being a little hard on yourself.
Steve Orbit: Am I? There's no reason why I should have lost last week. I could have SWORE I had him beat, but... sometimes these things happen, I guess. I been playing the shit back in my mind all week, I just can't figure out how I lost. That's why I'm thinkin' maybe I ain't the bad mother fucker I used to be.
Cormack chuckles.
Cormack MacNeill: Seriously? You're gonna pull that shit?
Steve Orbit: Yeah, but--
Cormack MacNeill: But nothing! I didn't come here to listen to you feel sorry for yourself. Your whole style is about confidence. Listen... when you were World Champion, I was so inspired by you. I was having a rough time putting together some meaningful wins, but watching you, and listening to you cut promos-- sometimes, I won't lie, it kept me going. No matter who knocked you down, who kicked your ass, you got back up and in the end-- you came out on top. Every time. Name a feud you didn't eventually win.
Orbit's eyes cut from side to side, racking his brain.
Cormack MacNeill: Nobody. You stood up, fought hard, kept coming back. Never gave up. Never gave in. Never sold out to fear or failure. Come here for a second. I want to show you something.
MacNeill motioned towards the truck and the two men moved to stand by the driver's side door. Cormack pointed to the side mirror, and Orbit leaned in, looking for what the big man was pointing out.
Cormack MacNeill: What do you see?
Steve Orbit: I see my reflection. What the hell are you...
Cormack MacNeill: No! What you see is the guy that kicked your ass last week. He's the reason Logan in squeaking out a win every time.
Steve Orbit: ... Really?
Cormack MacNeill: Really. You've been bringing Steve Orbit to the ring every week. Good guy, sharp dresser, good with the ladies. But he ain't gonna cut it in WCF. He's got no future. You know who does?
Steve Orbit: Nah...who?
Cormack MacNeill: The fucking Mack does. Steve Orbit sells fucking hot sauce. The Mack wins fucking World Titles. This week, we don't need Steve Orbit. We need the Mack. WCF needs the Mack.
Orbit nodded.
Cormack MacNeill: Cormack and Steve ain't got a chance against Riddik and Logan this week. They ain't gonna cut it. Know who does?
Steve Orbit shrugs, but then a smile crosses his face as the answer sinks in.
Steve Orbit: I think I do.
Cormack MacNeill: Big Mack and THE Mack. Put those two together, anyone on the other side of the ring is gonna have a long goddamned day.
Orbit grins.
Steve Orbit: Shit, havin' a big mother fucker like you can't hurt, that's for sure.
Cormack leans against the wall, crossing his massive arms.
Cormack MacNeill: Steve, I want to send a message this week. I think you do, too.
Orbit nods.
Cormack MacNeill: I'm coming for Dag Riddik and that International Championship. This week I plan on showing him exactly why I'm a threat to his title. I'm hungry for success. You need to get hungry again. The Mack needs to get hungry again
Orbit considers Cormack's words for a moment.
Steve Orbit: God damn, you right Big Mack. Can I call you Big Mack?
Cormack chuckles.
Steve Orbit: You know what? I'm lettin' this mother fucker get in my head. Logan. I been sittin' here all week thinkin' this dude is better than me. And I know he ain't better than me. I had a bad night last week. I dropped the fuckin' ball. This week I'm pickin' it back up.
Cormack MacNeill: That's what I want to hear. That's what a champion says.
Steve Orbit: And the Family. I hated this fuckin' group since day one, but I couldn't figure out why. Then it hit me-- Buddy Roman, the Vapor Kings. We was family. Steve Orbit-Roman, that ring a bell? Now Logan and his fuckin' flock of nobodies is all havin' the same last names, like we all supposed to forget that Vapor Kings was doin' that shit already. Bitin' our style. But you know what the difference is between the Vapor Kings and the Family? We was on top of this fuckin' company for half a year, for our entire existance. Logan been conniving and tryin' to worm his way back to the top, well I'ma knock his ass back down a peg this week. WE gonna knock the Family down a peg. Two weeks ago I put Logan and the Family down with the help of Rebellution. This week, I'ma do it with help from the Big Mack.
Cormack beats his thick chest.
Steve Orbit: Yeah, I read on the Internet that Logan gonna be celebratin' his victory over me at Slam. Well guess what, we about to cut that celebration short real quick when him and Dag Riddik come up on the losing end this week, you know what I'm sayin'? And speakin' of Dag Riddik--
Cormack MacNeill: Can't stand him.
Steve Orbit: YOU can't stand him? This mother fucker can't open his mouth without spittin' some kinda hillbilly redneck racist bullshit.
Cormack looks at the truck and then looks back at Orbit, and looks like he's ready to say something.
Steve Orbit: Nah, that ain't what I'm sayin'. What I'm sayin' is this mother fucker is so boring and unoriginal that he has to rely on shock factor to get his name out there. It ain't even the racist shit that bothers me-- I been hearin' that bullshit every time some unoriginal hack goes and cuts a promo against me since I signed with WCF. It ain't nothin' new. Where is the creativity in that? "Derrr, blacks! JEWS and homos, I hate 'em! DERRRR." Sound like a God damn thirteen year old on some YouTube comments. Must be why he's considered a "contender" for the Internet belt, but he STILL can't touch my man Z-MAC when it comes down to it. Only thing he got goin' is that International Championship, and I got a feelin' he about to drop that you.
Cormack MacNeill: Damn right he is. He'll get a taste this week, and he's not gonna like it.
Steve Orbit: Shit, it might taste worse than this fuckin' Mack Sauce.
Both men laugh.
Steve Orbit: Aight man, I gotta go back inside and wrap this thing up. I'ma see you at Slam.
They shake hands.
Cormack MacNeill: Good talk, man.
Cormack pushes off the wall and heads back to his pickup. Orbit goes back inside the building. Fade out.
The black truck slowly pulls out of the parking lot and moves back into traffic. Cormack reaches over and turns on the radio, and immediately he finds a classic rock station. Grooving to the strains of Bob Seger he moves through the sparse traffic and through downtown Colorado Springs, heading for Denver and his hotel.
Shit, this is a nice little place. Next time, I'll have to bring Isla along. Although it's nice to be the center of attention once in a while. It's hard to keep anyone's attention when she's around. hell, it's hard to keep my mind on business when she's around. Maybe the Mack's got it right. Don't mix ladies and business.
Cormack has a brief mental image of him hunched over a computer, bashing away at the keys and trying to book a flight, a hotel, and transportation. The image smashes the keyboard in frustration, keys flying to every corner of the imaginary room, and MacNeill shakes his head.
I think I'll keep her involved. Cost me less that way, and I'll actually make it to places on time. And she irons a mean kilt. Straightens it right out. Which is only right since she's the one putting dents in it to begin with.
The song changes to something by the Foo Fighters, and he starts scanning the stations again. Nothing but country and top 40 stuff can be heard.
Shit. I knew we were coming to the boondocks, but I don't think the radio stations would be this bad. Wait, I know one that's worth listening to.
He hit the AM/FM button and dialed up to 1300 am. KCSF radio. The Sports Animal.
Welcome back. I'm Matt and he's Ryan. This is Drive-Time and we're discussing our guest Cormack MacNeill. Can you believe the lies he spouted Ryan? Thinking he can beat Logan?
I know Matt. He's a boudle bitch for sure.
Cormack slowly turned the volume dial down to zero and make a few taps on his phone...
KCSF Studios
Colorado Springs, CO
Once again, it's Matt and Ryan on Drive-Time. Our producer is telling us we have a caller on line 1 who wants to weigh n on our guest today. Caller, do you agree with us? That Cormack MacNeill is a skirt-wearing boudle bitch?
There was dead silence, and then a low pleasant voice spoke.
Well laddies....
And that's all the time we have for today. Up next, the Jim Rome Show...
Fade to Black
KCSF 'The Sports Animal' Radio Station
Colorado Springs Colorado.
'And welcome back to Drive-Time Sports, driven by Suss Superstore. We're your hosts for the next few hours, and I'm Matt Pauley.
'And I'm Ryan Kaufman. Today we have a special guest on Drive-Time. WCF Superstar Cormack MacNeill is in the studio. Say hi to the listeners, wouldya?
Hey, and thanks for having me on today laddies. I love doing stuff like this. If I play my cards right, maybe I can even catch a hockey game before heading home.
Denver is only an hour up the road. Although they aren't looking like they'll have a good year. They're in the middle of a ...
Rebuild. Yeah I know. You gotta give them time to develop. They've got good young talent and a good coach. They'll be fine. Anyway, I was thinking about catching a Tigers game. Lot of NHL players came out of that college.
That's true. Enough about hockey, let's talk about the upcoming show this Sunday. You're facing off against Dag Riddik and Logan, with Steve Orbit on your side. What can the fans expect to see?
First off, the fans are going to see an awesome show. We've got the best wrestling talent in the world working for us, and every show is always full of great action and more than a few surprises.
Ok, what about your match? What can you tell the folks at home who might have not been watching lately. I understand you're the number one contender to Dag Riddik's International Championship, right?
Right Ryan. We'll face off for the title at Explosion. This Sunday will be a good chance for folks to get a preview of that match. And some great wrestling.
Right. This match has the International Champion, a WCF Hall-of-Famer in Logan, and a sure fire first ballot Hall-of-Famer in Steve Orbit. What can you tell us about your gameplan?
Well, I'm not going to give it away Matt, but I will tell you this much. It's an honour stepping in the ring with a man like Steve Orbit. Two-time World Champion, among many other belts he's held over the years, outs him in a class of his own. It's always nice to have a partner that you know you won't have to worry about. If anything, it's me that's got some proving to do. And Steve and I will be on the same page, count on that. He wants to get his hands on Logan as badly as I want to get my hands on the Champ.
Logan...what do you make of him. Legendary wrestler, another multi champion. What are your chances againt him.
No argument from me, Logan is a Hall-of-Famer. Legendary career, some of the best matches ever put on in a WCF ring. There's no arguing his talent. It's his drive that comes into question. His work ethic. It's as if Logan is just biding his time, waiting for a retirement that honestly should have come years ago. He built a legacy that will stand the test of time, and he's pissing all over it. Making a fool out of himself running around with the Family, using rookies to make himself look fresh and relevant. It's almost like he doesn't know who he is if he's not in the WCF. He's everything Orbit isn't. Orbit is active, relevant, always dangerous. Logan is a shell of his former self. A joke. A clown that plays for his own amusement, too self-centered to understand that as long as he plays at being a wrestler, there's some kid somewhere looking to break in that just won't have the opportunity. So, am I worried about Logan. Not with the real Hall-of-Famer on my side. not anymore. He's not the Logan of old. He's just going through the motions.
I might not have a mastery of moves, won't find me flying around the ring, but I'm steady. Dedicated. Working to make myself and those around me a little better every day. Picking up my lunch pail and going to work, while guys like Logan and Dag Riddk play at being wrestlers.
Wow, ok. What about the Champion, Dag Riddik. I'm getting the feeling there's no love lost between you two.
No, there's isn't. He took the belt from a worthy champion in Punkin/Caliban, and shit all over it. Men like Kira Sakazaki and Trent Hunter wore this strap. Even a younger, more relevant Logan wore it. Now Dag spends his days on the internet, talking trash on social media instead of getting out there and making that damn title mean something again. mark my words boys, when I win that strap from him at Explosion, I'm going to make it relevant again. Make it mean something. Defend it every night if need be. And I will spend my time being a true International Champion.
Not like Riddik who's hiding behind his 'Family' and making threats online. He's a sham, a fake, a pseudo-Norwegian knothead. I've stood in the ring with some talent, and fought against some as well. I know talent when I see it. Logan, he has talent. No clue what to do with it anymore, but his pedigree speaks for itself. Steve Orbit, he's got talent oozing out from every pore.
Dag's the odd man out here. He's got no place in this match, and he's got no chance of holding onto that belt. In a way, I'm actually happy he's hiding out and not putting the belt up. I'm the number one contender, and I'll take on whoever is wearing that International Title at Explosion. No problem. But there's something about Dag Riddik that makes you want to kick his head off his shoulders. And kick his ass all around Colorado Springs. And before the night is over, I'll do my best to make both of those things come true.
Well, that was enlightening. You heard it here folks. Get your tickets for Slam this Sunday while they last. Thanks again for spending time with us Cormack, and good luck in your match this Sunday.
Thanks guys, and wish Dag Riddik luck, he;s going to need it more than I will.
Some time later...
A black pickup truck rolled slowly along Colorado Springs' main road. Squat brown buildings lined up on either side of the street like cadets at inspection. The large figure behind the wheel looked from side to side as he moved down the road smoothly. Clearly he's looking for something. After a few more minutes of this, he pulls over to the curb and fishes out a phone from the center divider. His bearded visage furrows as he tries to type on the small phone with his broad hands.
(Sausage fingers and smartphones don't mix folks. Take it from me)
He looks up from the phone in frustration and stares straight ahead at the building a few units down from where he parked. A small man stumbles out of the front door, gagging and spitting. He throws up very violently and seems to toss a small bottle towards the street. The bottle rolls to a stop a few feet from the truck, so Cormack steps out slowly and gives it a kick. The bottle rolls over to reveal the label, which reads simply
Mack Sauce
With a shake of his bald head, Cormack climbs back into the truck and puts it in gear, rolling smoothly down the street and turning into the lot past the still spewing figure. He moves to the back of the building, and backs into what appears to be an alley. Having given up on typing, he flicks a button on the dash and settles the phone into a cradle near his knee. A loud bing sounds from the trucks stereo system, and MacNeill reaches down to make several clumsy swipes at the phone's display. After a few awkward attempts, a ringtone can be heard in the cab.
Yeah, this is Orbit.
Orbit, it's Cormack.
Cormack, what's up.
Just got here. Parked out back in the alley.
Aight, just wait. I'm finished, I'm comin' out now
Behind the studio building, a 2015 pickup truck rolls into a parking spot. Orbit exits the building and lights a Black & Mild. A large, intimidating, mountain of a man exits the pickup truck and begins to head towards Orbit. As he gets closer, we realize that this man is none other than Orbit's tag team partner for the week-- Cormack MacNeill. Orbit extends his hand as Cormack draws near, and the two men shake hands.
Steve Orbit: Cormack MacNeill. You bigger than I expected.
Cormack grins.
Steve Orbit: Look man, I appreciate you takin' the time to meet me here. I know it ain't the ideal situation, I'm just real busy this week.
Cormack MacNeill: No problem Steve, had to get out of the hotel anyway. But what's up with the secret meeting? Why here?
Orbit pulls out a bottle of Mack Sauce.
Steve Orbit: Cuttin' hot sauce promos.
Cormack laughs. He takes the bottle and examines it.
Cormack MacNeill: Mack Sauce... any good?
Orbit laughs.
Steve Orbit: Hell no! Shit tastes like rat poison and dog piss mixed with gunpowder.
Cormack takes off the cap and sniffs it. His face screws up and he lets out a hearty cough, handing it back to Orbit.
Steve Orbit: See what I mean?
Cormack MacNeill: Smells like Z-Mac's jockstrap. And don't ask me how I know what the smells like.
Steve Orbit: Anyway, people tellin' me I need to expand my brand. I'm tryin' to get as many checks comin' in from as many sources as possible-- I ain't tryin' to be that guy who has to wrestle when he's fifty, nah mean?
Cormack MacNeill: Aye.
Orbit takes a pull off the Black & Mild.
Steve Orbit: Besides, I keep turnin' in performances like last week, I might have to hang this shit up sooner than I thought.
Cormack shakes his head in disagreement
Cormack MacNeill: You looked great to me. Good as ever.
Steve Orbit: Yeah, thanks-- except I lost to freaking LOGAN. AGAIN. This mother fucker ain't won a match in five years and all of a sudden he's beating me at every turn.
Cormack nods, and there's a brief moment of silence.
Cormack MacNeill: I think you're being a little hard on yourself.
Steve Orbit: Am I? There's no reason why I should have lost last week. I could have SWORE I had him beat, but... sometimes these things happen, I guess. I been playing the shit back in my mind all week, I just can't figure out how I lost. That's why I'm thinkin' maybe I ain't the bad mother fucker I used to be.
Cormack chuckles.
Cormack MacNeill: Seriously? You're gonna pull that shit?
Steve Orbit: Yeah, but--
Cormack MacNeill: But nothing! I didn't come here to listen to you feel sorry for yourself. Your whole style is about confidence. Listen... when you were World Champion, I was so inspired by you. I was having a rough time putting together some meaningful wins, but watching you, and listening to you cut promos-- sometimes, I won't lie, it kept me going. No matter who knocked you down, who kicked your ass, you got back up and in the end-- you came out on top. Every time. Name a feud you didn't eventually win.
Orbit's eyes cut from side to side, racking his brain.
Cormack MacNeill: Nobody. You stood up, fought hard, kept coming back. Never gave up. Never gave in. Never sold out to fear or failure. Come here for a second. I want to show you something.
MacNeill motioned towards the truck and the two men moved to stand by the driver's side door. Cormack pointed to the side mirror, and Orbit leaned in, looking for what the big man was pointing out.
Cormack MacNeill: What do you see?
Steve Orbit: I see my reflection. What the hell are you...
Cormack MacNeill: No! What you see is the guy that kicked your ass last week. He's the reason Logan in squeaking out a win every time.
Steve Orbit: ... Really?
Cormack MacNeill: Really. You've been bringing Steve Orbit to the ring every week. Good guy, sharp dresser, good with the ladies. But he ain't gonna cut it in WCF. He's got no future. You know who does?
Steve Orbit: Nah...who?
Cormack MacNeill: The fucking Mack does. Steve Orbit sells fucking hot sauce. The Mack wins fucking World Titles. This week, we don't need Steve Orbit. We need the Mack. WCF needs the Mack.
Orbit nodded.
Cormack MacNeill: Cormack and Steve ain't got a chance against Riddik and Logan this week. They ain't gonna cut it. Know who does?
Steve Orbit shrugs, but then a smile crosses his face as the answer sinks in.
Steve Orbit: I think I do.
Cormack MacNeill: Big Mack and THE Mack. Put those two together, anyone on the other side of the ring is gonna have a long goddamned day.
Orbit grins.
Steve Orbit: Shit, havin' a big mother fucker like you can't hurt, that's for sure.
Cormack leans against the wall, crossing his massive arms.
Cormack MacNeill: Steve, I want to send a message this week. I think you do, too.
Orbit nods.
Cormack MacNeill: I'm coming for Dag Riddik and that International Championship. This week I plan on showing him exactly why I'm a threat to his title. I'm hungry for success. You need to get hungry again. The Mack needs to get hungry again
Orbit considers Cormack's words for a moment.
Steve Orbit: God damn, you right Big Mack. Can I call you Big Mack?
Cormack chuckles.
Steve Orbit: You know what? I'm lettin' this mother fucker get in my head. Logan. I been sittin' here all week thinkin' this dude is better than me. And I know he ain't better than me. I had a bad night last week. I dropped the fuckin' ball. This week I'm pickin' it back up.
Cormack MacNeill: That's what I want to hear. That's what a champion says.
Steve Orbit: And the Family. I hated this fuckin' group since day one, but I couldn't figure out why. Then it hit me-- Buddy Roman, the Vapor Kings. We was family. Steve Orbit-Roman, that ring a bell? Now Logan and his fuckin' flock of nobodies is all havin' the same last names, like we all supposed to forget that Vapor Kings was doin' that shit already. Bitin' our style. But you know what the difference is between the Vapor Kings and the Family? We was on top of this fuckin' company for half a year, for our entire existance. Logan been conniving and tryin' to worm his way back to the top, well I'ma knock his ass back down a peg this week. WE gonna knock the Family down a peg. Two weeks ago I put Logan and the Family down with the help of Rebellution. This week, I'ma do it with help from the Big Mack.
Cormack beats his thick chest.
Steve Orbit: Yeah, I read on the Internet that Logan gonna be celebratin' his victory over me at Slam. Well guess what, we about to cut that celebration short real quick when him and Dag Riddik come up on the losing end this week, you know what I'm sayin'? And speakin' of Dag Riddik--
Cormack MacNeill: Can't stand him.
Steve Orbit: YOU can't stand him? This mother fucker can't open his mouth without spittin' some kinda hillbilly redneck racist bullshit.
Cormack looks at the truck and then looks back at Orbit, and looks like he's ready to say something.
Steve Orbit: Nah, that ain't what I'm sayin'. What I'm sayin' is this mother fucker is so boring and unoriginal that he has to rely on shock factor to get his name out there. It ain't even the racist shit that bothers me-- I been hearin' that bullshit every time some unoriginal hack goes and cuts a promo against me since I signed with WCF. It ain't nothin' new. Where is the creativity in that? "Derrr, blacks! JEWS and homos, I hate 'em! DERRRR." Sound like a God damn thirteen year old on some YouTube comments. Must be why he's considered a "contender" for the Internet belt, but he STILL can't touch my man Z-MAC when it comes down to it. Only thing he got goin' is that International Championship, and I got a feelin' he about to drop that you.
Cormack MacNeill: Damn right he is. He'll get a taste this week, and he's not gonna like it.
Steve Orbit: Shit, it might taste worse than this fuckin' Mack Sauce.
Both men laugh.
Steve Orbit: Aight man, I gotta go back inside and wrap this thing up. I'ma see you at Slam.
They shake hands.
Cormack MacNeill: Good talk, man.
Cormack pushes off the wall and heads back to his pickup. Orbit goes back inside the building. Fade out.
The black truck slowly pulls out of the parking lot and moves back into traffic. Cormack reaches over and turns on the radio, and immediately he finds a classic rock station. Grooving to the strains of Bob Seger he moves through the sparse traffic and through downtown Colorado Springs, heading for Denver and his hotel.
Shit, this is a nice little place. Next time, I'll have to bring Isla along. Although it's nice to be the center of attention once in a while. It's hard to keep anyone's attention when she's around. hell, it's hard to keep my mind on business when she's around. Maybe the Mack's got it right. Don't mix ladies and business.
Cormack has a brief mental image of him hunched over a computer, bashing away at the keys and trying to book a flight, a hotel, and transportation. The image smashes the keyboard in frustration, keys flying to every corner of the imaginary room, and MacNeill shakes his head.
I think I'll keep her involved. Cost me less that way, and I'll actually make it to places on time. And she irons a mean kilt. Straightens it right out. Which is only right since she's the one putting dents in it to begin with.
The song changes to something by the Foo Fighters, and he starts scanning the stations again. Nothing but country and top 40 stuff can be heard.
Shit. I knew we were coming to the boondocks, but I don't think the radio stations would be this bad. Wait, I know one that's worth listening to.
He hit the AM/FM button and dialed up to 1300 am. KCSF radio. The Sports Animal.
Welcome back. I'm Matt and he's Ryan. This is Drive-Time and we're discussing our guest Cormack MacNeill. Can you believe the lies he spouted Ryan? Thinking he can beat Logan?
I know Matt. He's a boudle bitch for sure.
Cormack slowly turned the volume dial down to zero and make a few taps on his phone...
KCSF Studios
Colorado Springs, CO
Once again, it's Matt and Ryan on Drive-Time. Our producer is telling us we have a caller on line 1 who wants to weigh n on our guest today. Caller, do you agree with us? That Cormack MacNeill is a skirt-wearing boudle bitch?
There was dead silence, and then a low pleasant voice spoke.
Well laddies....
And that's all the time we have for today. Up next, the Jim Rome Show...
Fade to Black
