***The FoLLoWiNG IS FROM THE BLOG OF LA JOHNNY STYLEZ***
@thedonofdi$Re$PeCT419
Take my two opponents this week and you'll be able to see exactly what the phuck I'm talking about. I mean just looking at these two asshatz, and you can see how desperately this company needs someone like me. I mean the both of them have their heads so far up their own asses they can't tell the got damn difference between an idea and a
!!!!!F'N WET FART!!!!!
NoT To MeNTiOn THeY ARE BoTH LIKE HoRRIBLE ADULT SWIM CARTOON CHARACTERZ!!!
I mean first and foremost let's take the guy who USED to be the Internet Champion, in Zombie McMorris. I'll give this phuck mook some credit, he can be slightly entertaining when he wants to be, and is good for a chuckle here and there. But I mean really how am I supposed to take this asshat seriously. I mean one minute he is sitting on the side of the road pretending to be a bum...Let me say that one more time a
!!!!!B.U.M.!!!!!
ReaLLy?....ReaLLy?....SERIOUSLY?
What is he the only guy in this company who doesn't get paid? I mean I hate to burst everyone's bubble, but I prefer to live in a little place I like to call reality, and the reality of the situation is, as entertaining as Zombie McMoRoN's antics are at the end of the day that asshat may be a bm at heart but one thing he is more so than anything else is a lame ass
!!!!!F'N GIMMICK!!!!!
So ZoMBIE If You'RE LISTENING TO THIS LAME ASS, DO US A FAVOR AND
!!!!CUT THE CRAP!!!!!
Because SeRiOuSLy DIP SHIT It's GETTING PATHETIC!!!
First and foremost, how do you find the time to out of your busy schedule of dumpster hopping and eating left over cheeseburgers that probably have bits and pieces of dirty diapers and tampons in them to engage yourself into a week long Twitter battle with OLDIN Balfore? I mean I am fully aware that one can practically connect to the internet from a got damn microwave these days, but I wasn't aware that the homeless population of the world were connected to the net.
I mean maybe that's why their signs are getting funnier or something, but do you expect ME, or anyone else with half a phucking brain to take you and anything you do seriously? Because when the camera is on you sure you are this crazy guy who eats baby shit cheeseburgers, and lives in a cardboard mansion that would make that homeless character Damon Wayan's used to play on In Living Color jealous, but I get the feeling that as soon as the cameras are turned off, you hop right out of the dumpster, take your little costume off and go home to your wife and kids back to your little house with the white pickett fence, and your little phucking faggoty ass yippie dog that your wife carries around in a puppy purse!
And that is why despite your various accomplishments and very commednable reign as WcF Internet Champion I refuse to respect you, because you Zombie McMorris aint about
!!!!S.H.I.T.!!!!
Maybe You Enjoy The Dirty Tampon Burgers, And Doing Coke While Dropping Houses On People, But You Are No More A BuM Than Johnny Fly Is A Good DeFeNse ATTORNEY!!!
And that is why you lost your title to the WcF's walking lame ass OLDIN Balfore because even the best lies eventually give way to the truth! Because like I said you aint nothing but a gimmick, because just like the rest of us you collect a pay check. And the only reason you act the way you do, is the same reason Brodus Clay runs around a WWE ring acting like he can dance, and that's because you can make a few simple minded morons who are unable to put two and two together chuckle a little bit. But the bad news jerk off is that this week live on pay per view all the chuckles come to a abrupt and sudden stop when The DoN of DiSReSPECT
!!!!DoEZ A RiVeR DaNCE ON YOUR F'N FOREHEAD!!!!
PuSSy!!!!
So yeah, get back on Twitter, like Paris Hilton and the rest of the dip shits who use that lame ass social media site and pretend to be whoever you are pretending to be this week, because I'm tellin ya this right now FaGGoT, your fifteen minutes of fame are just about DoNe! So if I were you phuck mook I'd go shopping for a new gimmick, because afrer I'm done mopping the floor with your sorry ass all anyone is going to see you as, is what you have so desperately tried to make them see you as over the last few months and that my foul smelling friend is a mother phucking
!!!!!!J.o.K.E.!!!!!!
...And To Think You Were Once Champion Of The Internet Was An Insult To Well
!!!!!THE INTERNET!!!!!
KiNda LiKe WHeN AL GORE SAID HE INVENTED THE INTERNET!!!
As I'm sure you will watch this and come up with some crazy response to it, why don't you do us a favor and
!!!!F'N SPARE US!!!!
Because The Card Has Been Pulled, ANd We All Know You're Just Full of SHIT!!!
Because unless you are the only person in this company who doesn't get paid, in which case you are an even bigger idiot than I originally anticipated, or you found someone's laptop or cell phone while digging in the dumpster for musty and crusty packets of ketchup. Because I don't doubt you are a sick phuck. The lengths you go to to get a few chuckles out of people and to lay claim to fame and fortune are down right stomach turning. Hell you almost make the guys from Jackass who are willing to stick live scorpions up their ass in order to be famous seem sane. But people like you need to be
!!!!BeaTeN IN PUBLIC!!!!
And I AM GOING TO DO JUST THAT!!!
!!!!SO PHUCK YOU!!!!
AND YOUR LAME ASS GIMMICK!!!
But really I can't say I blame you for being the way you are, because if I was as pathetic as you I'd spend all my money snorting cut up baby laxatives as well!
But let's change the subject shall we because I feel as if I have wasted enough time and my precious breathe on WcF's old news! But speaking of old let's talk about the most horrific thing to hit the internet since
!!!!TWO GIRLZ ONE CUP!!!!
STARING OLDIN BALFORE's MOTHER AND SISTER YAY!!!
Ha, but all joking aside having OLDIN Balfore as the Champion of the Internet is like listening to Tiger Woods give a lecture on
!!!!A.B.S.T.I.N.E.N.C.E.!!!!
ANd BeING SoMeOne WHo DoESn'T GET LaID YOU KNOW THAT ONE DOESN'T FIT DOES IT OLDIN?
Now don't get me wrong I am not prenouncing your name wrong on accident, it's a cute little change up I added to it. And yes I heard you try and correct me saying you were only in your thirties, but I mean come on asshat, look at yourself! You've got more grey hairs then George Clooney's nut sack, and well everything else about you aside from your appearence phucking screams retirement home! I mean every got damn week from you it's the same song and dance. Same song different lame ass verse! You are going to do this, because ten years ago you did that. I mean it's to the point where every time you go to open your cock suckings mouth all I hear is
!!!BLA, BLA BLA, I WAS THE WCF CHAMP TEN YEARS AGO, BLA BLA I LiKe LITTLE BOYZ BLA BLA!!!
...Either Way I Find it Hard To Follow Or Even Care About
Because well quite frankly I can tell you right now phucko that I and the rest of the WcF fan base and roster could give a phuck less about what you did ten years ago, five years ago, phuck I don't even care what you did ten minutes ago! Yet you are guilty of making two very big mistakes! Mistake numero uno mother phucker is thinking that you are relevant enough for us to care about every little action you under take!
You wanna come out here and tell everyone what you had for breakfast or what your opinion on the current state of the WcF main event is, when well you have just as much to do with that as I do. Which brings us to your second and might I add
!!!!BiGGeST PHUCKING MISTAKE!!!!
This Is The Part Where You PuLL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR GAPING ASSHOLE, DIP SHIT!!!
Because if you think for two got damn seconds that just because I may not be as big of a name around here as you think you are yet that you are going to walk all over me, then you my friend need to leave the thinking up to someone else because you are obviously out of your got damn mind! This business has been and always will be about the future!
And well everything about you screams the past, with the execption of the Internet Championship, but that is a burden I promise you I will lift from your posession this week! Because as I just got done saying I am aware you've been there and done that as far as this company goes! I understand that you were the World Heavyweight Champion once upon a time, and even though I know it's been a while you must take into consideration that once upon a time you were in the same position I am in now!
I'm sure you once had big grey haired goofy looking sonz a bitches just like yourself telling you they were going to beat your ass because they didn't know who you are! And I mean really,
?IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?
Because If That's Your Game Plan MoRoN YOU GOT A LONNNNG DAY AHEAD OF YOU!!!
But since we are on the subject, go ahead OLDIN! Go right ahead and be the ignorant ogre looking phuck mook that you are, because in all honesty
!!!I PREFER IT THAT WAY!!!!
BECAUSE THAT MAKES ALL OF THIS WORTH IT!!!
Because when IRONY slaps you across your bitch ass face and it ends up that you were the one who made the rookie mistake in underestimating me that ended up costing you the only thing that made you relevant in this federation then I not only leave that pay per view with your Championship Belt, but I will also take the only thing you have left after that which happens to be your
!!!!!F'N DIGNITY!!!!
Because This AinT A BATTLE OF REPUTATIONZ YA FUGGIN DUMB SHIT!!!
Because incase you haven't noticed I have made quite the name for myself as of late! I have attainted more victories than I have losses, and well I know you aren't exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer because well I had to do something in order to gain a shot at your Title now didn't I?...But I guess what they say is true, maybe ignorance is bliss, and if that's the case then you must be the
!!!!GAYEST MOTHER PHUCKER IN THE WcF!!!!
...AND BY GAY I OF COURSE MEAN...Uhh....HaPPy?
Because I know what you bring to the table, don't make the mistake of thinking that just because I don't respect you one bit that I don't know what you are capable of. Because unlike you I am not a narrow minded dumb shit who doesn't know his ass from his hat...See WHAT I DID THERE?
...Anyway...I know that even now a win over you would do wonders for my career, because well the reason I am in this match in the first place is to try and take what you have. And I know that is going to take more than a smile. And from that little stroll down memory lane you should have gathered that there isn't a whole lot I'm not willing to do in order to see this thing all the way through!
Because I didn't come all this way just to fail now. I came to prove that I am the future of this company and a better representation of the INTERNET and the INFORMATION HIGH WAY that it is then you could ever be! And in order to do that I have to make and keep the same promise that I made Adam Young a few weeks back in saying that my soul intent and purpose for being in this company is to
!!!!R.E.P.L.A.C.E.!!!!!
JERK OFFZ LIKE YOU WHO HAVENT SPENT WAY TOO MUCH TIME AT THE TOP!
And the reason I do this OLDIN is because this company needs me to do it! This company needs a change because dip shits like you are a dime a dozen these days! It seems like every single one of these asshats wants to come out here and tell bed time stories about their past accomplishments when if we wanted to hear or see any of that bullcrap all we had to do was watch the DVD, which I gotta tell ya INTERNET CHAMp I was on AMAZON.com the other day and I saw your greatest match DVD, and well let's just say that the other movies in WALMART's FiVE DOLLAR BIN WERE
!!!!!LAUGHING AT YOU!!!!!
THE SAME AS THE FANS WILL BE WHEN I WALK OUT OF THE PPV WITH YOUR CHAMPIONSHIP!!!
Because now is my chance to show The Wrestling Championship Federation what I am truly capable of! ANd ya know again if you didn't have your head buried in your ass all the time you would be able to see how much I really have accomplished here in such a short time. I have not had ONE...Not one match here that was a singles match. Every single contest I have competed in was one of Seth Lerch's clusterphuck TRIOS or Tag Team Matches yet he still saw enough in me to give me this opportunity! So let me ask you a question OLDIN, you're a fat phuck you like applez don't ya?
SO HoW Ya LiKe THEM APPLEZ B.I.T.C.H???
My FIRST SINGLES MATCH HAPPENS TO BE A CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH!!!
And one thing quite a few WcF superstars have found out the hard way is that I am much more than just ambition and potential! I am even more than shit talking, because I can back it up as I have backed it all the way up into your backyard and whether you choose to acknowledge it or not I represent an immediate threat to you, your championship reign and everything else you stand for! Because all it takes is three phucking seconds big boy! Three seconds and I ram each and every single one of your ignorant, moronic statements down your bitch ass throat and I send you back to your locker room
!!!!EMPTY F'N HANDED!!!!
CHOKING ON YOUR OWN PHUCKING BULLSHIT!!!
And when the team of EMT's revive you and explain to you that you lost and they are currently trying to devise a medical procedure to remove my boot from your ass you are going to then maybe learn how phucking foolish you were to have doubted the future of this company! Because I am going to tell you right now I am coming into this match fighting like my life is on the line, because to me it is! Because up until this point I'll agree with you Oldin, you are right.
Maybe I aint such a big name around here yet, and me whooping your punk ass depends on that, so you had better believe I am going to do everything within my realm of capability to see that it happens! Because like I said all it takes is three phucking seconds. Three seconds later and you will become a FORMER CHAMPION! Three phucking seconds and you can tell everyone first phucking hand who the phuck I am! Because you can bet your sorry ass that if I walk out of that Pay Per View the WcF Internet Champion EVERYONE WILL KNOW EXACTLY WHO THE PHUCK I Am!
And that is precisley what I live for dip shit! It is why I broke into this phucking business in the first place. Is to take mother phuckers like you who want to try and write me off like I aint shit and then PROVE THEM WRONG! And as much as you want to try and over look me I REFUSE TO LET YOU!
And that is who I am and that you over grown dried up tally whacker is precisley why I am the FUTURE of this company and why YOU on your best day ARE NOW JUST THE PAST! Because my legacy has to begin somewhere and it is going to begin with you! So again OLDIN BALFORE come on out and tell everyone that just because you were the World Champion a long time ago that is the reason you are going to beat me! Go ahead because after it's all said and done the only thing you are going to be able to tell anyone about me is that yes you know who LA Johnny Stylez is...
He's the guy who took your WcF Internet Championship from you, he's the guy who ended your last run as champion in the company you claimed to be top dog of, and most importantly he is the guy who made you
!!!!!!SoaK!!!!!
!!!!!SoMe!!!!
!!!!!!UP!!!!!!
LiVe ON PAY-PER-VIEW!!!!
You want my respect?..You're gunna have to beat it out of me! You want to hold onto that title OLDIN you are going to have to prepare for the fight of your life. Because I promise you this mother phucker you come into this match not in the mindset that you are fighting for your life I promise you that you'll lose.
BEcause I'm gunna tell ya this right now big boy I don't fight fair. Because the only thing that matters in this company and in this business in general is victory! And if you want to walk out with that title you are going to have to PUT ME DOWN FOR GOOD, because as I have made perfectly clear throughout this PROMO is that this BUSINESS is MY LIFE, and when a man fights for his life he is more dangerous than anything else...And that my friend is a truth your sorry ass is going to find out the hard way I promise you! So enjoy what's left of your title reign because your time is up! In other words lame ass...
!!!!SoMeOnE CALL THE FAT LaDy!!!!
...AND TELL THAT BITCH SHE IS ON IN 5!!!!
...See ya SUNDAY LADIEZ!!!!
