Post by Logan on May 1, 2019 1:06:37 GMT -5
The camera focuses on a pair of size thirteen black boots; boots that will sure enough be stomping the Skittles out of Lilith’s brains. We pan up more to catch the first glimpse of Logan in YEARS. The Face of Treachery stares into the camera hoping that Lilith has changed the channel from Sponge Bob and is staring back.
Logan: Nearly three years ago… three long years ago was the last time you boudles have seen me on a WCF promo. Three years ago I lost the WCF championship to a man I was 14-0 against, Oblivion. But when the time came, when it mattered the most, that stuttering trashcan pulled the biggest upset out of his big fat ass and beat me.
Mr. WCF looks down at his boots, shaking off some disappointment.
Logan: Truth be told, and these are facts by the way, someone put sedatives in one of my prematch warm up hotdogs before the match, and yeah, I fell asleep. Oh yeah babygurls, was totally out. You don't believe me? SHUT UP! I said I was drugged. Passed out during the match, and that was the only way a boudle bitch like Oblivion could ever pin me. So, recap time, after that when I stumbled backstage, I tried to wake myself up. Coffee wouldn't do it. Cocain - when - Coca Cola couldn't do it. So I did what made sense at the time and shot myself in the face.
He signals to the black leather eye patch covering his socket.
Logan: If anyone can take a jolt of energy via gunpowder to the skull it's Mr. WCF! Long story short, after the gunshot, I felt quite awakened so obviously my genius worked. However someone must have drugged the bullet as well because this time I took another nap and this one took three years to wake up from. So I come back to WCF just mid last week only to find out… it's closing? And not only is it closing but my last match ever in WCF history is against… Lilith?
He looks around for a gun to shoot himself again. Damnit. No such luck.
Logan: So you are telling me that the man that built WCF from gym house shows to sold out stadiums, the man that has been here since the very beginning, the man that has battled and beaten different generations of WCF’s very best gets sent off with a match with… Lilith? Three time War winner versus grown woman who collects teddy bears. Six time world champion versus someone who crushes up Skittles and snorts them. Mr. WCF versus… Ms. Crayon Eating Stuff a Hotdog Up Her Own Privates Just To Get My Attention Whore!
He paces back and forth a bit prior to continuing.
Logan: Fine. Works for me. Because let me tell you something right now. WCF began with me and it will end with me. Yes, I'm talking about the main event, Seth Lerch vs Corey Black. So right after I'm done closing the lid on that trashcan mouth of Lilith I am announcing right now that I am going to be in that main event one way or another. And at any moment Corey can taste my boot for the one thousandth time, and Seth Lerch - ‘Mr. Boo-hoo I can't run WCF anymore I need more time to play with my naked life size Torture sex doll’, can both… BOTH of those fools catch a ticket right to Connector City!
The Face of Treachery snorts into the camera before it fades out.
Logan: Nearly three years ago… three long years ago was the last time you boudles have seen me on a WCF promo. Three years ago I lost the WCF championship to a man I was 14-0 against, Oblivion. But when the time came, when it mattered the most, that stuttering trashcan pulled the biggest upset out of his big fat ass and beat me.
Mr. WCF looks down at his boots, shaking off some disappointment.
Logan: Truth be told, and these are facts by the way, someone put sedatives in one of my prematch warm up hotdogs before the match, and yeah, I fell asleep. Oh yeah babygurls, was totally out. You don't believe me? SHUT UP! I said I was drugged. Passed out during the match, and that was the only way a boudle bitch like Oblivion could ever pin me. So, recap time, after that when I stumbled backstage, I tried to wake myself up. Coffee wouldn't do it. Cocain - when - Coca Cola couldn't do it. So I did what made sense at the time and shot myself in the face.
He signals to the black leather eye patch covering his socket.
Logan: If anyone can take a jolt of energy via gunpowder to the skull it's Mr. WCF! Long story short, after the gunshot, I felt quite awakened so obviously my genius worked. However someone must have drugged the bullet as well because this time I took another nap and this one took three years to wake up from. So I come back to WCF just mid last week only to find out… it's closing? And not only is it closing but my last match ever in WCF history is against… Lilith?
He looks around for a gun to shoot himself again. Damnit. No such luck.
Logan: So you are telling me that the man that built WCF from gym house shows to sold out stadiums, the man that has been here since the very beginning, the man that has battled and beaten different generations of WCF’s very best gets sent off with a match with… Lilith? Three time War winner versus grown woman who collects teddy bears. Six time world champion versus someone who crushes up Skittles and snorts them. Mr. WCF versus… Ms. Crayon Eating Stuff a Hotdog Up Her Own Privates Just To Get My Attention Whore!
He paces back and forth a bit prior to continuing.
Logan: Fine. Works for me. Because let me tell you something right now. WCF began with me and it will end with me. Yes, I'm talking about the main event, Seth Lerch vs Corey Black. So right after I'm done closing the lid on that trashcan mouth of Lilith I am announcing right now that I am going to be in that main event one way or another. And at any moment Corey can taste my boot for the one thousandth time, and Seth Lerch - ‘Mr. Boo-hoo I can't run WCF anymore I need more time to play with my naked life size Torture sex doll’, can both… BOTH of those fools catch a ticket right to Connector City!
The Face of Treachery snorts into the camera before it fades out.
