Episode 5 Jul 31, 2018 21:24:29 GMT -5
Post by Darkwing Wolf on Jul 31, 2018 21:24:29 GMT -5
The title sequence of the show plays and we cut to a shot of the Sixth Dimension Arena. Pyro goes off one by one from each entrance ramp. The cameras pan the audience. Some fans are cheering, some are screaming into the camera, and some are holding signs. “The Heretic Anthem” by Slipknot plays throughout this introduction.
James Eastwood: Last week, chaos, panic, and disorder ruled.Tonight, we’ll see if the trend continues here on The Sixth Dimension!
We get a shot of James Eastwood and Alamo Franklin at their broadcast table.
James Eastwood: Hello, everyone! I’m James Eastwood and alongside me is the legendary and hopefully more talkative Alamo Franklin!
Alamo Franklin: Don’t be a smartass, Eastwood! Last week, I was more pissed off than a midget with a yo-yo. I hope Cliff of Doom beats the hell out of Caleb Ronan tonight.
James Eastwood: And in the mood that Cliff of Doom is in after last week, I wouldn’t want to be Caleb Ronan. After that, Ded Memry will take on Dean Wolf in our main event. These two are the only two men left undefeated in this tournament. By the end of the night, only one of The Handler’s six creations will be 3 and 0! I don’t know about you, but I am really looking forward to this contest.
Alamo Franklin: Me too! We got two badass sons of bitches who know how to beat people up, and tonight, they’re going to do it to each other! I love violence!
James Eastwood: You’ll get plenty of that, but first, let’s take you to our colleague Sylvia Evergreen who’s with Cliff of Doom.
Sylvia Evergreen is in the backstage interview area with Cliff of Doom to her right.
Sylvia Evergreen: Thanks, James. Cliff, last week’s loss against Bernard Core had to be a tough pill to swallow, especially considering that you attempted a rope break that was disrupted by Dean Wolf. Have you gotten over that and if not, will it serve as a distraction for you in tonight’s match against Caleb Ronan?
Cliff of Doom: I wish I could say I haven’t been thinking about that all week, but I can’t. I’m the kind of guy that tries to push through adversity and forget about the past, but no matter what I’ve done to try to get my mind off of what happened, the only thought that I keep going back to is that I’m pissed off!
We can hear the crowd cheering.
Cliff of Doom: Before last week, only three things motivated me; my wife, winning the championship, and stopping Bernard Core. Now the only thing that motivates me is kicking Dean Wolf's ass!
More cheers from the crowd.
Cliff of Doom: But first, I have to go through Caleb Ronan, which is fine because I’m going to use Caleb Ronan as practice. Practice for when I eventually get my hands on Dean Wolf inside the ring. And Caleb, if you want to invite your little Social Justice Club down to the ring like you did last week, I’ll get my practice in on them, too! I'm aching to beat somebody's ass tonight, so if anybody wants to come down to the ring and help me get my fill, please, PLEASE don't hesitate!
Cliff looks off camera to his left. The camera pans out and we see Biff Mustache to the cheer of the crowd. Sylvia doesn’t look too happy to see him.
Sylvia Evergreen: Biff, what are you doing? This is Cliff of Doom’s interview time right now.
Biff Mustache: I’m sorry, Everbabes, but I just need to apologize to my man Cliff of Poon for not being in his corner last week when he went up against Bernard Whore. I wish I’d been there to stop Dean Muff from costing you the match. Tonight, I’m gonna make it up to you because I’ve got a boner to pick with Caleb after he cost me my match against Ded Mammary.
Sylvia Evergreen: You mean a bone?
Biff Mustache: Yeah, a boner.
Sylvia Evergreen: Bone.
Biff Mustache: What am I saying?
Cliff of Doom: It doesn’t matter. Biff, don’t worry about last week. I might have done the same thing as you if I had been in your position. And as far as tonight goes, I appreciate you wanting to help me but I don’t want you to put your hands on Caleb during my match. That’s what The Core Institute does and I want to be the furthest thing from those two guys.
Biff Mustache looks disappointed.
Biff Mustache: Alright, man. I won’t put my hands on Caleb tonight. We cool?
He puts out his hand. Cliff stares at it before looking at Biff’s face and smiling.
Cliff of Doom: Yeah, man, we cool.
They shake and have a bro hug. Cliff walks away as Biff pats him on the back.
Biff Mustache: Go get him, man.
He watches Cliff walk away. Biff looks back at Sylvia and smirks.
Biff Mustache: I’m gonna make it up to him anyway.
He goes to walk away before Sylvia says “Ahem.” He looks back at her and sees in her face that she’s expecting something.
Biff Mustache: I guess I owe you an apology, too.
Sylvia Evergreen: I would say so. I was really looking forward to our date and then you ditched me to go chase after Caleb Ronan all night.
Biff Mustache: I’m sorry. Let The Biffster make it up to you. I’ll take you anywhere you want.
She looks at him unsure of his proposal.
Sylvia Evergreen: Anywhere?
Biff Mustache: Anywhere.
She stares at him for a few more seconds before answering.
Sylvia Evergreen: You better make sure you have enough in your bank account because you’re taking me out for a full course meal at the most expensive place I can find.
Biff Mustache: You got it.
He starts to walk away but we can still hear him off camera.
Biff Mustache: Full course meal. Whatever you want. It’ll be great. I’ll see you…
His voice starts to trail off. Sylvia looks back at the camera.
Sylvia Evergreen: James, back to y---
Biff comes back on camera and interrupts her.
Biff Mustache: Does this mean we’re going to have sex tonight?
She stares at him blankly.
Sylvia Evergreen: Is that really a question you should be asking me right now?
He shifts his eyes to the side before looking back at her and answering her diffidently.
Biff Mustache: No?
Sylvia Evergreen: Good answer.
He stares at her awkwardly before tip-toeing away. Sylvia looks at one of the production staff off camera.
Sylvia Evergreen: Sometimes I can’t believe I left the late local news in Bismarck for this.
She walks off camera. We go back to James Eastwood and Alamo Franklin.
James Eastwood: I guess the “budding romance” of Biff and Sylvia continues. Anyway, we have a breaking development here at the broadcast table.
The camera pans out as Eastwood continues to talk. We see a rather stocky man in a black collared shirt standing next to Alamo Franklin.
James Eastwood: During Sylvia’s interview with Cliff of Doom, a member of Sixth Dimension security informed us that he’s been assigned to guard Alamo Franklin and make sure that he doesn’t go after Caleb Ronan during the upcoming match.
Alamo Franklin: This is horseshit! Does The Handler really think that this meathead is going to stop me if I want to kick Caleb Ronan’s head in?!
He looks up at the security guard.
Alamo Franklin: You can stand there with your muscles all you want! If I want to kick Caleb Ronan’s ass, I will, and then maybe afterwards I’ll kick your ass, too!
The security guard just stares straight ahead and doesn’t react.
James Eastwood: Alright, Alamo, take it easy. Judging by Caleb’s other matches, I’m sure there won’t even be enough time for you to get your hands on him. Let’s just get to the action and Gordon Gould with the introductions.
The bell rings. “Some Nights” by fun plays.
Gordon Gould: This contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Centereach, NY, weighing in at 150 pounds, Caleb Ronan!
The crowd boos. Caleb has a shit eating grin on his face. Instead of looking at this cell phone, as he usually does, he’s waving to the crowd as if he were the President riding down Pennsylvania Avenue in a motorcade.
James Eastwood: Well, Caleb seems awfully proud of himself after what he did to Biff Mustache last week. Two weeks ago, he was near suicidal because of all the failures he was experiencing in and out of the ring, but now he’s a few thousand dollars richer and succeeded in costing Biff Mustache, whom he despises for his lifestyle, any chance at winning the Sixth Dimension Championship. Look at that smug smile on his face! He really does have a face you want to punch.
Alamo Franklin: No shit, Einstein.
Caleb walks past the broadcast table and antagonizes Alamo by giving him his own personal wave. Alamo tries to jump the table to the delight of the fans but the security guard is able to hold him back as Caleb walks away.
Alamo Franklin: Lemme at ‘im! Lemme go, you big goddamn ape!
After a few seconds, Alamo gets a hold of himself and sits back down. He looks at Eastwood, a little embarrassed that he was bested by the security guard.
Alamo Franklin: That son of a bitch is strong. I’ll get away from him next time, though.
Caleb gets in the ring and continues to troll the crowd with his fawning.
The arena goes dark. Metallica’s James Hetfield finger picks over the sound of strings and wind instruments to begin “No Leaf Clover”. When the rest of the band kicks in, a spotlight shines on Cliff of Doom, who is at the top of his ramp posing with his arms stretched, fists clenched, and his head thrown back while he lets out a yell.
Gordon Gould: His opponent, from Selden, NY, weighing in at 218 pounds, Cliff of Doom!
Cliff walks down to the ring. At the end of the first verse, the song cuts to the guitar solo, by which point Cliff climbs on to the second rope and repeats the same pose from before.
James Eastwood: Cliff needs a big win this week after the loss he suffered to Bernard Core last week. A loss to Caleb Ronan would sure be a confidence killer for anybody.
Cliff takes off his vest and hands it to the ring attendant. The ref calls for the bell. Cliff gets in a wrestling stance but Caleb puts his hand up. The crowd does not like the delay. Caleb reaches into his pocket and grabs his cell phone. The crowd boos louder. He walks over to the ring attendant and directs him to take good care of his phone.
James Eastwood: Well, the people may not like that he’s holding up the match, but at least he’s getting rid of the phone.
Alamo Franklin: Yeah, that’s it. Let’s commend him for somethin’ he’s SUPPOSED to do.
When Caleb is ready, he faces Cliff. The two circle each other and get ready for a collar and elbow tie up when “Da Ya Think I’m Sexy” starts to play. The crowd cheers.
James Eastwood: What the hell?
Biff Mustache comes down his ramp with a swagger in his step. Cliff throws his hands in the air in frustration. Caleb gets a worried look on his face and turns to see Biff.
James Eastwood: For someone whose chances of winning this tournament have been dashed, Biff is certainly in a good mood.
Biff walks over to the ring attendant and grabs a mic. His music cuts off. Cliff starts yelling something to Biff.
Biff Mustache: Cliff, my man, calm down. You said you didn’t want me to put my hands on Caleb Bonin’ and I’m not.
Caleb breathes a sigh of relief.
Biff Mustache: I just came down here to...steal his cell phone.
Biff snatches the phone off of the ring attendant’s table and runs away. Caleb starts going crazy. He reaches through the ropes and tries to grab Biff but Biff motions like he’s going to hit Caleb and Caleb quickly backs away. Biff laughs and goes back up his ramp with the phone. Cliff just smirks and shakes his head. Caleb starts frantically looking back between Cliff and Biff. The crowd loves to see Caleb in a panic.
James Eastwood: Look at Caleb! He doesn’t know what to do!
Caleb continues to be insanely irresolute before he finally decides to run at Cliff of Doom, who nails him with a super kick. The crowd explodes. Cliff lifts Caleb up and gets him on the top turnbuckle. He climbs to the top rope, stands Caleb up, gets his arm around Caleb’s chest, and moonsaults off the top rope for his version of a C-4.
James Eastwood: CLIFFHANGER!!!
The crowd pops.
Upon landing, Cliff wastes no time in locking in his submission hold.
James Eastwood: NO LEAF CLOVER!
Caleb immediately taps. The ref calls for the bell. “No Leaf Clover” plays. Cliff lets go of Caleb’s legs and the ref raises his hand.
Gordon Gould: The winner of this contest, Cliff of Doom!
Alamo Franklin gives a standing ovation.
Alamo Franklin: I tell you what, that was almost as much fun as kickin’ Caleb’s ass myself!
James Eastwood: And with that win, Cliff is right back in the game while Caleb...well, you know already.
Cliff exits the ring and looks up at Biff. Biff smiles at him and raises his eyebrows. Cliff smirks back and nods his head. He goes up his ramp and walks through the curtain. The music fades out. Now the crowd cheers Biff, who gets a mic from a member of the production staff. Caleb is still on his stomach and looks pathetically towards Biff.
Biff Mustache: Well, well, well, Caleb Bonin’, how the turntables have turned.
James Eastwood: That doesn’t sound correct.
Biff starts to talk like he’s some supervillain in cheesy superhero movie.
Biff Mustache: Here I stand with your cell phone in my hand. And I say to myself, “Biffster, what do you need two phones for? You already have one.” Well, the answer is simple: I like to take dick pics.
The crowd cheers. Caleb’s face mouth goes agape and his face ashen.
Biff Mustache: I take one every day and at this point, I’ve taken so many that I’m starting to run out of room on my phone; so what I think I’m gonna do is delete all the pictures you’ve taken on your phone and start using it exclusively to take pictures of my wang.
The crowd applauds this idea. Caleb starts to get to his feet and slowly shakes his head. Biff looks down at the phone.
Biff Mustache: Oh, and I see you have an Instagram app.
Caleb goes wide-eyed. The camera shows him mouthing the word “no.”
Biff Mustache: Oh, dude, I could take a picture of my junk...and send it out for the whole world to see on your Instagram account!
James Eastwood: Caleb uses that Instagram account for his social activism! Imagine what that will do for his cred if a picture of Biff’s privates are shared to all of his followers in the social justice community!
Biff Mustache: Hey, everybody, if you’ve got an Instagram account, get your phones out and start following @calebronan6d right now! In about 10 seconds, I’m going to post the latest photo of my purple-headed yogurt slinger for all the world to see!
The fans start to pull out their phones.
James Eastwood: Purple-headed yogurt slinger? Now even for me, that’s gross.
He looks over at Alamo Franklin, who’s laughing his head off.
James Eastwood: Your mood changed quickly.
Alamo Franklin: You kiddin’ me? This is the best thing to happen on this program so far! Look, even this big dumb animal loves it!
He points to the security guard, who’s chuckling and pulling out his phone. Caleb is now on his knees begging Biff not to take a dick pic.
Biff Mustache: Alright, everybody ready? Let’s start the countdown!
The crowd starts counting along with Biff.
Biff Mustache: 10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2!...
“Show Me How to Live (T Rray Remix)” by Audioslave plays. Some in the crowd boo the interruption. The Hander walks out onto Biff’s ramp approaches The Mustachioed One. The music stops.
The Handler: Biff, I can’t let you do this.
The crowd boos some more.
The Handler: That’s Caleb’s personal property and I can’t allow you to take a dick pic with it. Hand the phone over to me now.
Biff looks disappointed as the crowd continues to let their displeasure be heard.
Alamo Franklin: Oh, come on! Man, this guy’s about as fun as a wet blanket.
Biff rolls his eyes and hands the phone over to The Handler. With the phone secured, The Handler walks down towards the ring. Caleb gets back to his feet and is visibly relieved that his phone and Instagram account have been saved. However, The Handler stops halfway to the ring. He looks down at the phone, then Biff, then Caleb. Caleb stares at The Handler. The camera picks up his words.
Caleb Ronan: Come on. What are you waiting for? Give me my phone!
The Handler: You know what? Both of you have one more match left and it just so happens to be against each other; and since it’s mathematically impossible for either of you to win the tournament at this point, we’ve gotta give you something to fight for, right? So I think that next week, the two of you are going to fight...for this phone.
He holds the phone in the air as the crowd cheers. Biff nods in approval while Caleb yells “NO” and shakes his head in the ring. The Handler goes to walk away, but after a few steps, he stops and looks like he has another idea. After a few seconds of thinking, he raises the mic back up to his lips.
The Handler: And just to make it MORE entertaining for the people here in the Sixth Dimension Arena…
The crowd likes to hear that.
The Handler: We’re going to put this phone in a bag, hang that bag high above the ring, and make your match next week...A LADDER MATCH.
The crowd goes bananas. Caleb throws a temper tantrum in the ring, stomping and shrieking at the top of his lungs “I’M OFFENDED! I’M OFFENDED!”
James Eastwood: Whoa! For the first time here in the Sixth Dimension, we’re going to have a Ladder Match, and the prize hanging from the rafters is going to be Caleb Ronan’s beloved cell phone!
Alamo Franklin: Man, I’m happier than a pig in shit! This is turning out to be one of the greatest days of my life. This might be even better than winning my first world title!
The Handler walks past Biff and through the curtain. Biff has a shit-eating grin of his own for Caleb, whose eye is twitching at a record pace as he stares down Biff. His fists are clenching rapidly as well.
James Eastwood: I think Caleb is at his wits’ end here. Just look at him. He’s close to breaking!
Alamo Franklin: Now he knows how the rest of us feel when he have to endure his bullshit.
James Eastwood: This is going to be one hell of a match-up! We’re going to head to a commercial. When we come back, we’ll have our main event as Ded Memry clashes with Dean Wolf!
The camera pans in and stays on Caleb’s twisted face as we fade to black.
We come back to a shot of Sylvia Evergreen, who’s standing backstage with The Core Institute. The crowd boos.
Sylvia Evergreen: Welcome back to the Sixth Dimension. I’m standing here with Dean Wolf who is joined by Headmaster Bernard Core. Dean Wolf, before your match with Ded Memry, I was wondering if I could get your reaction to Cliff of Doom’s comments from earlier in the show.
Dean Wolf goes to speak but is interrupted by Bernard Core before he can get a word out. Wolf looks annoyed but doesn’t say anything.
Bernard Core: Cliff of Doom can fight for anything he wants. He can fight for his homely wife, he can fight for his unattainable dreams, he can even fight to try and kick Dean Wolf’s derriere; but none of that is going to be enough for him. None of those motivators are going to be enough to help him win, especially against Dean Wolf. Dean Wolf fights for one thing and one thing only- for the glory of The Core Institute. He has sacrificed everything in his life to fight for the principles set forth by myself and my institute of higher learning. He has left behind all of the things that he desired in his life to fight for me and my visions. Has Cliff of Doom done that? Has Cliff of Doom left the comforts of his life to fight for a higher purpose? No. He’s fighting so that can he live more comfortably. I would think that as a student of history, Cliff of Doom would understand that when it comes to winning back the culture of a nation, there is no such thing as comfort, only sacrifice- and it’s in that sacrifice where true victory lies.
Sylvia Evergreen: Um..that was eloquent but the question was for Dean Wolf.
Bernard Core: Dean Wolf and I speak with one voice. That’s why The Core Institute is so successful- there is no dissidence.
Sylvia Evergreen: I don’t know about that. In your match against Cliff of Doom last week, Dean Wolf looked awfully defiant when you demanded that he assist you.
Bernard Core: That was just a diversion, a way to keep Cliff of Doom off his guard, and I don’t know about you, but I’d say it worked!
Sylvia looks at Wolf.
Sylvia Evergreen: Dean Wolf, is that true? Was that your plan all along or did you decide at the last second to interfere in the match and cause Cliff of Doom to lose.
Core interjects again.
Bernard Core: You know what? This interview is ov---
Wolf pulls the microphone up to his mouth, causing Core to stop mid-sentence. The Headmaster looks stunned. Wolf looks straight into Sylvia’s eyes. The camera pans in on his intense face. He talks slowly, almost trembling.
Dean Wolf: Cliff seemed to enjoy reminding everyone about hitting me with the Doomerang two weeks ago. I’m not intimidated by Cliff of Doom because he kneed me in the face one time. He found out last week that I’ve got one hell of a finishing move, too; and when I step into the ring with him in two weeks, not only am I going to give him that finishing move again, but I’m also going to tear his leg from his body and beat him over the head with it until he passes out from either severe head trauma or blood loss. As for my conduct in the Headmaster’s match last week, it’s none of your fucking business.
The crowd boos.
Dean Wolf: All that matters is the present, and right now, I’m going down to that ring to kick Ded Memry’s anonymous ass!
He and Core go to walk away but Sylvia speaks up.
Sylvia Evergreen: What about the future?
Wolf looks back at her quizzically. Core looks concerned, as if he knows what she’s talking about but hoping she won’t speak about it any further.
Dean Wolf: What about it?
Sylvia Evergreen: Well, next week, you are finally set to go one-on-one with Bernard Core, and a lot of people are speculating that you are not actually going to fight the man that you’re devoted to. Will you forfeit your match next week or will you actually fight Bernard Core? I mean, your alliance with Bernard Core notwithstanding, you’re still a competitor in this tournament, and if you go 3 and 0 tonight, you may have the best chance to make it to the finals and win the Sixth Dimension Championship. Is that a consideration for you, or are you simply going to allow Bernard Core to get the win and better his record?
Bernard Core intercedes.
Bernard Core: He’s going t---
Sylvia Evergreen: [sternly] I didn’t ask you.
The crowd cheers as she looks at Core defiantly. He’s taken aback. Wolf sneers at her.
Sylvia Evergreen: You made it very clear a few weeks ago that you can handle your own interviews, but this isn’t your interview time, it’s HIS.
She points at Wolf and sounds impatient with him as well.
Sylvia Evergreen: Now, Dean Wolf, will you fight Bernard Core next week- YES or NO?
Wolf’s nostrils flare as he stares at Sylvia. He goes to answer but stops himself. He looks down at the ground, conflicted about what he’ll do next week. Core is shocked that his protege is not swiftly answering in the negative and leans in towards Wolf to pressure him. Wolf looks up at Core and storms away without answering the question. Core’s eyes follow Wolf before he stares back at Sylvia disdainfully. She continues her defiant stare at the arrogant intellectual.
The screen fades into a shot of Ded Memry, who’s standing alone in what looks like the boiler room of the Sixth Dimension Arena. The crowd cheers. During his monologue, he creeps closer and closer to the camera.
Ded Memry: You know, Dean Wolf and I are similar in many ways. We’re both undefeated. We’re both brawlers. And we’re both fighting for somebody else. The difference lies in WHO we’re fighting for. Dean Wolf fights for another man- Bernard Core. I, on the other hand, am fighting for whoever is behind this mask, because when I win this tournament and the Sixth Dimension Championship, I am finally going to see who I really am, and that person will be the REAL champion, not Ded Memry- the person who wears this burdensome mask! You see, Wolf, just like you’re doing for Bernard Core, I’m doing the heavy lifting for the man behind the mask, and tonight may be the heaviest lifting I do because I know that just like me, you’ll do anything to win this match. I admire that about you...BUT UNFORTUNATELY MY ADMIRATION ONLY GOES SO FAR….because when you step into that ring with me, I’m going to do things to you that aren’t legal inside or outside that ring! I’m going to be too ruthless even for professional wrestling!
His face now takes up the entire shot.
Ded Memry: And when it’s all said and done...and my music plays...and I walk back up my ramp and through the curtain...you may have a new admiration for me. Maybe you’ll respect me. But most importantly, maybe you’ll understand why my devotion to the man behind this mask is just a little bit stronger than your devotion...to Bernard Core.
We go back to James Eastwood and Alamo Franklin at the broadcast table.
James Eastwood: Wow. We’ve got some possible tension in The Core Institute, Cliff of Doom and Dean Wolf chomping at the bit to rip each other to shreds, and Ded Memry threatening to do God knows what to Dean Wolf. Even Sylvia is getting a little bit punchy with Bernard Core. I don’t know what to expect going forward.
Alamo Franklin: If it involves people gettin’ beat up, I’m for it.
“SO SEEK THE WOLF IN THYSELF!”
“Of Wolf and Man” by Metallica plays as Dean Wolf enters the arena by himself. He walks down to the ring, not acknowledging the fans, not even to yell at them. The fans boo and howl.
Gordon Gould: This contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, representing the Core Institute, from Albany, NY, weighing in at 220 pounds, Dean Wolf!
James Eastwood: Dean Wolf looks preoccupied. You think he’s got his mind on his match next week with Bernard Core?
Alamo Franklin: Perhaps, but he’s got to get that out of his head. He said it himself- he’s got to worry about the present.
He gets in the ring and paces around, trying to get his mind focused.
James Eastwood: A very different Wolf than we’re used to seeing.
“Dead Memories” by Slipknot plays. The crowd cheers. Out comes Ded Memry, who wastes no time coming down to the ring.
Gordon Gould: His opponent, from parts unknown, weight unknown, Ded Memry!
Alamo Franklin: You know, I can understand if you don’t know where the guy comes from, but how the hell do you not know his weight? Just get him on a goddamn scale!
James Eastwood: I think most people are afraid of him and would rather just stay out of his way.
Ded gets in the ring and stands in his corner. He stares intently at his opponent.
James Eastwood: Here we go. Who will remain undefeated?
The ref calls for the bell and Ded immediately goes on the attack, throwing rights and lefts at Wolf in the corner. Ded starts stomping the Dean, who falls to his ass. Ded relentlessly continues stomping on his opponent, who wisely rolls out of the ring to safety.
James Eastwood: Nobody has ever come at Wolf like that before!
Wolf stares in amazement at Ded and nods his head.
Alamo Franklin: I think Wolf just realized that he’s in for a fight. This ain’t Biff Mustache or Caleb Ronan. Ded Memry is a whole different animal.
Wolf darts back into the ring and tackles Ded, throwing right hands of his own. Ded gets on top of Wolf and starts throwing rights of his own. Wolf pushes Ded off of him. Both men get to their feet and Wolf boots Ded in the gut. He sends Ded off the ropes but it’s reversed and Wolf is taken down with a clothesline.
Ded chokes Wolf and slams the back of his head into the mat. The ref begins a five count. At five, he pulls Ded off of Wolf. Ded stares at the ref for a few seconds. The ref gets a quick chill through his body.
James Eastwood: It looks like the ref is a little scared of Ded and I can’t blame him.
Ded goes back to choking and slamming Wolf’s head. Before the ref gets to five, Ded covers.
Wolf kicks out.
James Eastwood: Ded is just manhandling Wolf!
Ded gets him to his feet and slams his head into the turnbuckle. He whips Wolf into the opposite corner and charges but Wolf dodges, causing Ded to run chest first into the turnbuckle.
Wolf stomps Ded. Ded manages to grab the bottom rope and the ref forces Wolf to back away. Wolf argues with the ref and even gives him the middle finger. He moves past the ref and bends down to pick Ded up, but Ded grabs Wolf by his trunks and sends him shoulder first into the ring post. The force of the collision sends Wolf tumbling to the outside.
Ded follows Wolf to the floor and Irish whips him into the ring steps.
James Eastwood: Back first right into the steps!
Alamo Franklin: That’ll hurt for a few days.
Ded raises the steps over his head and makes his way to Wolf, but the ref hops out of the ring and stands in Ded’s way, admonishing him and ordering him to drop the steps. Ded slams the steps to the floor in anger. He grabs Wolf and whips him into the guardrail. Wolf sits up prone against the guardrail. He stomps to the opposite side of the ringside area, runs, and smashes Wolf in the face with his knee.
James Eastwood: What a shot!
He rolls Wolf back into the ring, drops an elbow, and covers.
Wolf gets his foot on the rope. Ded drags Wolf to the center of the ring and drops a succession of knees right across his face. He covers again.
Wolf escapes the pin. Ded gets Wolf to his feet, chokes him on the top rope, and throws him down to the mat back first.
Ded chops Wolf’s chest a few times before sending him off the ropes. The whip is reversed. Ded comes off the ropes. Wolf lifts him up and drops him with a Stun Gun on the top rope.
James Eastwood: That almost took Ded’s head off!
Wolf takes a second to recover from Ded’s onslaught while Ded grabs the ropes to get himself up to his feet. Wolf gets to his feet and sends both he and Ded over the top rope with a Cactus Clothesline.
James Eastwood: Both men spill to the outside.
Wolf walks Ded over to the steps that Ded threw to the floor and slams his head into them. He lifts up the mat to pull them back and expose the concrete, but the ref leaves the ring again, this time to order Wolf to leave the mats alone. Wolf argues with him. With the Dean distracted, Ded comes from behind the ref and axe handles Wolf to the ground. The ref gets sandwiched between the two competitors and falls to the floor as well.
Alamo Franklin: Wrong place, wrong time, ref. Just get out of the way and let these guys do their thing!
Ded throws Wolf into the ring. He attempts to send Wolf off the ropes, but Wolf reverse and hits Retention, his short-arm elbow smash/short-arm clothesline combination. Ded falls to the ground. Wolf stalks him, waiting for the masked enigma to get to his feet. Ded ends up on his feet but in a bent position, allowing Wolf to tag Ded with the Security Breach running knee lift. Ded doesn’t fall, but rather stumbles around. Wolf backs up a few steps and holds his left arm out. He spins.
James Eastwood: Here comes Detention!
Before he can connect with the clothesline, Ded falls to his knees and low blows Wolf.
James Eastwood: We haven’t seen Ded Memry use any underhanded tactics yet in this tournament, but I’m not surprised. This guy is willing to do whatever it takes to win the tournament and get that mask off.
Ded goes to the outside and gets a chair. He enters the ring and raises it. Wolf grabs the chair and the two struggle over it. The ref makes it back into the ring and grabs the chair himself.
The three men start pulling it back and forth. Finally, Ded and Wolf pull the chair out of the ref’s hands. They stare at each other before looking back at the ref and hitting him in the abdomen with the chair. The ref collapses to his knees. Ded smacks the ref over the back with the chair. The ref falls to his stomach. Ded offers the chair to Wolf, who accepts the offer and hits the ref over the back with the chair as well!
James Eastwood: They are massacring this referee!
Alamo Franklin: He was asking for it! He should have just let these guys do whatever they wanted!
Wolf tosses the chair into the corner. They grab the ref and throw him to the outside.
A second ref runs down to the ring and begins reprimanding the two men for what they did to the first ref. They stare at each other again before they both kick the second ref in the stomach. The crowd goes wild.
James Eastwood: These two have lost their minds!
Ded gives the ref Memory Loss. Then, he picks up the ref and whips him towards Wolf, who hits Detention on the official. They stomp the ref out of the ring.
Ded and Wolf stare at each other. Wolf starts to laugh maniacally as he goes nose to nose with his opponent. The crowd is loving the spectacle in the ring.
James Eastwood: It seems these two have found a common bond!
They start trading punches. Wolf gets the better of the exchange and boots Ded in the face and over the top rope.
Wolf goes to whip Ded into the steps but it’s reversed and Wolf goes into the steps himself. Ded throws him into the guardrail again and goes for another running knee smash, but this time Wolf moves out of the way, causing Ded’s knee to crash into the barrier. He grabs his knee and turns around, where he’s Cactus Clotheslined over the guardrail and out into the crowd.
James Eastwood: I’m being told that no other referees want to come out here and officiate this contest after what happened to our first two refs. This match is just going to continue until one of the two refs laid out at ringside comes to!
They start moving their way further into the crowd, trading fists.
They end up on the concrete steps. Ded gives Wolf a quick right, which temporarily stuns him. He grabs the railing to stay on his feet. Ded continues to walk up the steps, stalked by Wolf. Wolf reaches him and brings a forearm over his neck. Ded collapses into a row of fans, who move out of the way but cheer the unusual action.
Wolf picks Ded up and hits him with a right hand. Ded collapses into an empty seat. Wolf steals a cup of soda from a fan, takes a sip, spits the liquid into Ded’s eyes, and smacks him upside the head with the nearly full cup.
James Eastwood: A soda as a foreign object? Incredible!
Alamo Franklin: It ain’t brass knucks but it’ll do!
Wolf grabs Ded’s head and gets him to his feet, but Ded punches him in the gut and slams his head into the railing. Ded grabs his hair and drags him all the way to the top of the steps.
Ded cocks his fist back and looks at the crowd, who encourage him.
James Eastwood: Oh God, what’s he thinking about here?
Ded clocks Wolf with a right hand. Wolf falls back and rolls down the steps a few feet.
James Eastwood: Falling down those steps can lead to serious injuries!
Ded walks down to meet Wolf. He hits him with another right hand, causing Wolf to fall down a few more steps. The third time Ded goes to send Wolf down the stairs, Wolf blocks the punch and slams Ded’s head into the railing. Ded stays on his feet but wobbles down the stairs. Wolf follows and boots Ded in the back, causing Ded to roll down the remainder of the steps. The crowd is cheering savagely for the violence.
Wolf gets to the bottom of the steps, gets Ded to his feet, and drags him back towards the guardrail. As they approach the barrier, Ded grabs Wolf, spins him, and throws him over the safety apparatus. Ded takes a second to breathe before climbing over the guardrail. He grabs Wolf and throws him over the broadcast table into James Eastwood and Alamo Franklin.
James Eastwood: LOOK OUT!
Alamo dodges Wolf, but Wolf lands right in Eastwood’s lap, causing him to topple over in his chair.
Alamo Franklin: Holy hell, Eastwood! You alright?
You can hear the sound of Eastwood’s headset fumbling around.
Ded stands on top of the table and pulls Wolf up to join him. Eastwood stands up.
Alamo Franklin: You thought this would be a non-contact job, didn’t you?
James Eastwood: Yeah, silly me. Wait, what’s Ded Memry going for here?
He sets Wolf up for a piledriver. He tries to lift but Wolf blocks it. Wolf lifts Ded up instead and grabs a hold of his feet.
James Eastwood: Oh God, I hope the table doesn’t break!
He drives Ded’s head into the table with an inverted piledriver. The crowd roars. Thankfully, the table doesn’t break.
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
Wolf climbs off the table. He grabs Ded and rolls him back into the ring. He walks to the other side of the ring where the first ref is still laid out on the floor. He rolls the ref back into the ring and tries to revive him. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Ded coming at him. He turns around but Ded kicks him in the abs. He attempts to whip Wolf into the ropes but Wolf reverses and hits a picture-perfect Double A spinebuster.
He stalks Ded and waits for him to get to his feet.
James Eastwood: I think he wants to go for Security Breach!
When Ded gets to his feet, Wolf comes off the ropes. However, Ded doesn’t wait for Wolf to attack. Instead, he charges at him and locks in the sleeper hold.
James Eastwood: He’s going for Memory Loss!
Ded tries to sweep the leg but Wolf avoids it. He lifts Ded onto his back and drives him into the corner. Both men collapse.
While Wolf struggles to get to his feet, Ded grabs the chair that he and Wolf used on the ref earlier in the match. When Wolf turns around, Ded smashes the chair over his head. Wolf falls like a stack of bricks.
James Eastwood: My God! Did you hear the sound that chair made up against his head?!
Ded revives the ref and drags him over to Wolf. Ded covers and the ref slowly starts to count. The crowd counts along.
2 ¾ …
Kickout! The crowd goes apeshit.
Crowd: THIS IS AWESOME :clap clap clap clap clap: THIS IS AWESOME :clap clap clap clap clap:
James Eastwood: I can’t believe he got up after that! Who do you think he’s fighting for, Alamo?! Bernard Core or HIMSELF?!
Alamo Franklin: I think he’s just fighting to survive right now!
Ded stomps around the ring in frustration. He gets Wolf to his feet and makes a slashing motion across his throat. He locks in the sleeper hold again and goes to sweep the leg, but Wolf flips him over. Ded shoots up to his feet like he just got dropped onto a pile of hot coals but is met with Wolf’s finishing move.
James Eastwood: DETENTION!
Wolf collapses to the ground along with Ded.
James Eastwood: He’s too spent to make the cover!
Alamo Franklin: Don’t waste this opportunity, Wolf!
Ded rolls to his side while Wolf crawls towards the corner. He pulls himself up and leans up against the turnbuckle. He motions for Ded to stand up.
Ded gets up to his feet. Wolf dashes out of the corner, spins, and hits Detention a second time.
James Eastwood: He leveled him!
Wolf collapses with Ded, but this time, he lays his back across Ded’s body and hooks the leg. The ref counts, still slowly. The crowd counts along.
The ref calls for the bell. “Of Wolf and Man” plays.
Gordon Gould: The winner of this contest, Dean Wolf!
Wolf takes some extra time just to get up to his ass. He holds his head, which is still reeling from the chair shot.
James Eastwood: THAT was a war.
Alamo Franklin: We’ve seen some great wrestling on this show, but that was the best FIGHT in this tournament.
James Eastwood: That might end up being the MATCH of the tournament. It was unconventional and the wrestling purists might not like it, but these two men put EVERYTHING on the line and gave these fans a hell of a fight. I’ll tell you something, Wolf might have won the match, but Ded has nothing to be ashamed of.
Alamo Franklin: I agree- absolutely nothing.
James Eastwood: These fans agree. Look at them! They’re giving both of these men a standing ovation!
The standings graphic appears on screen.
James Eastwood: With that win, Dean Wolf is now the only man left undefeated in this tournament. He does however, have that match against his boss, Headmaster Bernard Core, next week. What’s going to happen when those two step into the ring togeth---hey, what’s this?!
The cameras cut abruptly back to the ring where Cliff of Doom comes from out of nowhere and rains rights and lefts on Wolf. He throws Wolf to the outside and then throws him over the announce table.
James Eastwood: Not again!
Luckily, both men get out of the way this time. Cliff of Doom marches to the other side of the table and continues to throw rights on the Dean who’s prone on the ground. Security rushes down to ringside and pull the two apart.
Alamo Franklin: Don’t break it up! Let ‘em fight!
Both men struggle to get out of the clasp of security. Cliff gets away from security, climbs up onto the apron, and dives at Wolf. Everyone falls to the ground. The crowd goes nuts. Ded Memry comes to and runs outside the ring to join the melee. He starts punching at Dean Wolf before trading blows with Cliff of Doom.
James Eastwood: Now Ded Memry’s getting involved! He’s got his match against Cliff of Doom next week!
Security tries to get a handle on the situation but with great difficulty.
James Eastwood: It’s absolute bedlam out here! Security needs to get a handle on this!
The Handler comes out to try and direct traffic. Even Bernard Core enters the fray to restrain his dean of discipline, but Cliff of Doom comes after him, too.
James Eastwood: To say that tensions have boiled over would be an understatement!
Finally, security is able to separate all four men, with each man being dragged up their own ramps, except for Dean Wolf, who is being brought up Core’s ramp.
James Eastwood: Folks, we’ve got to go, but next week we’re going to have three big matches, two of which could have major implications for the finals of this tournament. Cliff of Doom is going to take on Ded Memry, Bernard Core and Dean Wolf are finally going to step into the ring against each other, and Caleb Ronan will try to retrieve his cell phone in a LADDER MATCH! For Alamo Franklin and Sylvia Evergreen, I’m James Eastwood! See you next week!
The show fades to black as we get one more shot of each man being carried away by security.