Post by Corey Black on Apr 9, 2010 14:29:52 GMT -5
Our story begins on a bright and sunshine filled day. The hero of this tale, a man named Creeping Death, is taking a stroll through a park carrying his WCF Tag Team TItle. Children are playing around him, and he just seems so happy. One of the kids' basketball rolls to CD's feet. He bends over and picks the ball up for the child. The young boy runs away with glee. Without warning, a giant dragon flies over head! All the kids flip out and CD is confused.
Creeping Death: I ... am confused.
The dragon flies out of sight. The children and their parents seem scared to death. Creeping Death's phone rings.
Speaker Phone: Creeping Death! A dragon has just attacked the White House! It ATE BARACK OBAMA!
Creeping Death: NOOO! Not our President and outstanding citizen! He'll never see his health care bill go into effect! I must help!
CD looks to his left. Hangs up his phone. Then looks to his right. Hangs up his phone again.
Creeping Death: Drat! Continuity issues! How am I supposed to save President Obama if he is already being digested?!
One of the children runs by our hero, pretending to be a hero himself. Particularly..
Boy: I'm Superman! Wheeee! I can fly so fast that I can spin the world backward and revert time! Wheee! I hope this is relevant to the man I'm running by!
Creeping Death: That's just dipshited enough to work!
CD brings his wrist to his face and talks into his watch.
Creeping Death: Zordon! Teleport me to the Chamber of Good Stuff!
Nothing happens.
Creeping Death: Communication is out! I'll have to go this alone! This sounds like a job for...!
Our hero runs into a nearby telephone booth. Seconds pass, and the doors explode off!
Creeping Death: - AH WHAT THE FUCK!
No change.
Creeping Death: Superman is a pussy anyway.
CD puts his WCF Tag Team Title on the ground and stands on it. Nobody is paying any attention. The title itself starts transforming and turning into a suit. CREEPING DEATH HAS TURNED INTO IRON DEATH BY WAY OF HIS WCF TAG TEAM TITLE BECOMING AN IRON MAN SUIT. THIS STORY OWNS THE FUCKING WORLD.
Iron Death: Now, to save Mr. Obama!
ID uses his thrusters (lol) to fly into the sky and out of the sight of everyone at the park! We catch up to Iron Death as he is flying around the World at incredible speeds! The Earth begins to spin backward, just like in Superman: The Movie! But that movie sucked, so fuck Superman, Iron Man kicks all sorts of ass. Around and around it goes! Iron Death slows himself down and lands on Earth once again.
Iron Death: Now it's time to prevent that drag- OH FUCK WHAT IS THIS!?
A fucking T-Rex is approaching Iron Death.
Iron Death: Mother of fuck...
Our chapter ends with Iron Death charging a blast to take on an unruly dinosaur.
Creeping Death: I ... am confused.
The dragon flies out of sight. The children and their parents seem scared to death. Creeping Death's phone rings.
Speaker Phone: Creeping Death! A dragon has just attacked the White House! It ATE BARACK OBAMA!
Creeping Death: NOOO! Not our President and outstanding citizen! He'll never see his health care bill go into effect! I must help!
CD looks to his left. Hangs up his phone. Then looks to his right. Hangs up his phone again.
Creeping Death: Drat! Continuity issues! How am I supposed to save President Obama if he is already being digested?!
One of the children runs by our hero, pretending to be a hero himself. Particularly..
Boy: I'm Superman! Wheeee! I can fly so fast that I can spin the world backward and revert time! Wheee! I hope this is relevant to the man I'm running by!
Creeping Death: That's just dipshited enough to work!
CD brings his wrist to his face and talks into his watch.
Creeping Death: Zordon! Teleport me to the Chamber of Good Stuff!
Nothing happens.
Creeping Death: Communication is out! I'll have to go this alone! This sounds like a job for...!
Our hero runs into a nearby telephone booth. Seconds pass, and the doors explode off!
Creeping Death: - AH WHAT THE FUCK!
No change.
Creeping Death: Superman is a pussy anyway.
CD puts his WCF Tag Team Title on the ground and stands on it. Nobody is paying any attention. The title itself starts transforming and turning into a suit. CREEPING DEATH HAS TURNED INTO IRON DEATH BY WAY OF HIS WCF TAG TEAM TITLE BECOMING AN IRON MAN SUIT. THIS STORY OWNS THE FUCKING WORLD.
Iron Death: Now, to save Mr. Obama!
ID uses his thrusters (lol) to fly into the sky and out of the sight of everyone at the park! We catch up to Iron Death as he is flying around the World at incredible speeds! The Earth begins to spin backward, just like in Superman: The Movie! But that movie sucked, so fuck Superman, Iron Man kicks all sorts of ass. Around and around it goes! Iron Death slows himself down and lands on Earth once again.
Iron Death: Now it's time to prevent that drag- OH FUCK WHAT IS THIS!?
A fucking T-Rex is approaching Iron Death.
Iron Death: Mother of fuck...
Our chapter ends with Iron Death charging a blast to take on an unruly dinosaur.
